tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27803003142702907062024-03-14T11:31:05.870-07:00Misery and MerrimentRamblings of a Bipolar BitchChelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.comBlogger41125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-48622683999854590572012-08-14T23:41:00.000-07:002012-08-14T23:43:41.321-07:00Could be a cold or it could be the plagueDuanne got me sick. I have been in bed for the last three days with no signs of healing. If you have read my previous posts, you would know that being sick is abhorrent to me. I don't 'do' the whole sick thing. In fact this is the first time I am sick this winter. I am quite annoyed that my immune system let me down with only two weeks to go to Spring.<br />
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I am pretty sure that I am dying. No one will believe me though. I went to my mommy for some love in my last hours, I even had the big puppy dogs eyes complete with the nose sniffle but she rolled her eyes and told me I had a head cold.<br />
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How do you know that mom? Are you a doctor? I see no degree's or PhD's on our wall! Are you really willing to bet your youngest daughter's life on a mere whim? I should hope not!<br />
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T o prove to my mother that it could be more than just some common head cold I am suffering from I decided to Google my symptoms. (Biggest effing mistake)<br />
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<a href="http://symptoms.webmd.com/coresc/landing?condition=091e9c5e808e8122&bpid[0]=14&sid[0]=59&bpid[1]=10&sid[1]=219&bpid[2]=7&sid[2]=233" style="background-color: white; color: #3789b9; font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; outline: none; text-decoration: none;">Tuberculosis</a><br />
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Tuberculosis usually infects the lungs, causing a bad cough with blood, chest pain, fever, chills, and fatigue.</div>
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( I am not coughing up blood...<i>yet</i>!) I have got my eye on you Tuberculosis...</div>
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<a href="http://symptoms.webmd.com/coresc/landing?condition=091e9c5e808e80af&bpid[0]=14&sid[0]=59&bpid[1]=10&sid[1]=219&bpid[2]=7&sid[2]=233" style="color: #3789b9; font-size: 12px; outline: none; text-decoration: none;">Plague</a></div>
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Plague is a rare but deadly bacterial infection causing fever, vomiting, seizures, organ failure, and more.</div>
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(Besides the vomiting, seizures and organ failure this could totally be my disease.)</div>
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<a href="http://symptoms.webmd.com/coresc/landing?condition=091e9c5e808e81b3&bpid[0]=14&sid[0]=59&bpid[1]=10&sid[1]=219&bpid[2]=7&sid[2]=233" style="color: #3789b9; font-size: 12px; outline: none; text-decoration: none;">Pleural effusion</a></div>
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Pleural effusion is buildup of fluid in the pleura and can cause difficulty breathing or chest pain.</div>
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(I am not too sure what a Pleura is but I should have one and I could have a build up of fluid there.)</div>
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<a href="http://symptoms.webmd.com/coresc/landing?condition=091e9c5e808e7c3a&bpid[0]=14&sid[0]=59&bpid[1]=10&sid[1]=219&bpid[2]=7&sid[2]=233" style="color: #3789b9; font-size: 12px; outline: none;">Asbestosis</a></div>
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Asbestosis is a serious lung disease, causing shortness of breath, dry cough, chest tightness and more.</div>
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(OH HOLY CRAP! THIS IS MY DISEASE! But I also have a runny nose...Never mind, I will keep looking.)</div>
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I just booked for a Doctors appointment...Now we will see who is the drama queen, mother!</div>
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Things that make me feel better:</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgh_f3YSzgRIrDSAah5JhkegC2_zImW2gjV1aNUtqbkBTz7mRhSKN9SUkfIDEVOyLhGaMpq1gy7LXHj7NfKeKVBzHB1JWR6m5lyRVLc-9P1q4EKfo-C-n5MhnUTHgkK5p4_IO2429GarYn/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgh_f3YSzgRIrDSAah5JhkegC2_zImW2gjV1aNUtqbkBTz7mRhSKN9SUkfIDEVOyLhGaMpq1gy7LXHj7NfKeKVBzHB1JWR6m5lyRVLc-9P1q4EKfo-C-n5MhnUTHgkK5p4_IO2429GarYn/s1600/images.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Matt Bomer</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX1CXi8s1LXFrZGmM2rYXHRIke0x5ElLOIPKIkw21ZMAZRYWLBFtjp3zBP0myT2rOtpq315Zxy5ZkhHnddjCmNPjAwH6muXWngFLND0wBfd3Gb-1SEhW9h3L5_3L11jIzXn93Db-crS_3d/s1600/Jennifer-as-Katniss-jennifer-lawrence-20530829-1600-1152.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="230" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX1CXi8s1LXFrZGmM2rYXHRIke0x5ElLOIPKIkw21ZMAZRYWLBFtjp3zBP0myT2rOtpq315Zxy5ZkhHnddjCmNPjAwH6muXWngFLND0wBfd3Gb-1SEhW9h3L5_3L11jIzXn93Db-crS_3d/s320/Jennifer-as-Katniss-jennifer-lawrence-20530829-1600-1152.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Hunger Games</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi5wn6ODrOSTmfq042dG6jm-Le3KJX__6ALkQ85Py1hJ5Yk2Y1FZn4KztOAm9lnwmFE5Q-JBMs1Hw1oQ7Y8hmvY2npEu1nNQCbskx0IysWLpRU-gXiw4o8QQUGRCuRvDkXMPGX9rWQ1T3y/s1600/tyler-hoechlin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi5wn6ODrOSTmfq042dG6jm-Le3KJX__6ALkQ85Py1hJ5Yk2Y1FZn4KztOAm9lnwmFE5Q-JBMs1Hw1oQ7Y8hmvY2npEu1nNQCbskx0IysWLpRU-gXiw4o8QQUGRCuRvDkXMPGX9rWQ1T3y/s320/tyler-hoechlin.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Teen Wolf</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx8DIiW0rKJkJAXLX2N0GLaf7nLdV-QpANp-SzIaDZMoww3Yz-unIdmC6ICknYWFMGcQLFG3QrgrKr2f8Qcx6BcWe3A_Pp-9v-iMod66qK4_lT34isg_0JC7ubGZ6B8mwfM4AD3MJaaiBM/s1600/109478475-10_240x320.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx8DIiW0rKJkJAXLX2N0GLaf7nLdV-QpANp-SzIaDZMoww3Yz-unIdmC6ICknYWFMGcQLFG3QrgrKr2f8Qcx6BcWe3A_Pp-9v-iMod66qK4_lT34isg_0JC7ubGZ6B8mwfM4AD3MJaaiBM/s1600/109478475-10_240x320.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Jennifer Lawrence- She is just too damn sexy</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-l4ymr2vrLSBuvJQNHpRbwdnauHmXe2SsSXXVfWvtQkQj3grMon-e02rlavVaAEQGw-U1PfuzaS5M5UgaZHgnZGmyNYrEXHcvk9kRuTkmPbyeJHlk8KFFlGzmyAEZ2_ymLBA_7ZV0W7IA/s1600/52614128_thor1_bodyap.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-l4ymr2vrLSBuvJQNHpRbwdnauHmXe2SsSXXVfWvtQkQj3grMon-e02rlavVaAEQGw-U1PfuzaS5M5UgaZHgnZGmyNYrEXHcvk9kRuTkmPbyeJHlk8KFFlGzmyAEZ2_ymLBA_7ZV0W7IA/s1600/52614128_thor1_bodyap.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Thor</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-UlayadYafcoHo9buxuFXB_5VjiLxJHmOQoFpFtRPpv-U1B0SSvoHymzt2V4F9qbCMtD8BALj8-9CAxXiznPLRXAWtnAh8fXV0-LCmx9-VZr55QiYQy8XmvW2xgoanUzK2rUTgV8kiERW/s1600/tyler-hoechlin-tyler-hoechlin-31264789-1280-1024.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-UlayadYafcoHo9buxuFXB_5VjiLxJHmOQoFpFtRPpv-U1B0SSvoHymzt2V4F9qbCMtD8BALj8-9CAxXiznPLRXAWtnAh8fXV0-LCmx9-VZr55QiYQy8XmvW2xgoanUzK2rUTgV8kiERW/s320/tyler-hoechlin-tyler-hoechlin-31264789-1280-1024.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tyler Hoechlin</td></tr>
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<br />Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-90570370181595950752012-07-16T05:36:00.000-07:002012-07-16T05:37:13.487-07:00Puppy High<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgruR0E-P_ePi050LkjMZb8FmqxiB-OrbDLuWUtJw9pvY-NMrIQWn-VFI_oKxz6wCln4CEzFWgNJNTYHbc42p5IGR-oYwznLtDcbjkg3M_Hn7u0IBAsfgga_NMy326XcYdJ0AmeTTEjr1Sy/s1600/Boxer-Puppies.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgruR0E-P_ePi050LkjMZb8FmqxiB-OrbDLuWUtJw9pvY-NMrIQWn-VFI_oKxz6wCln4CEzFWgNJNTYHbc42p5IGR-oYwznLtDcbjkg3M_Hn7u0IBAsfgga_NMy326XcYdJ0AmeTTEjr1Sy/s1600/Boxer-Puppies.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Boxer Puppy</td></tr>
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<span style="background-color: white;">If you have been a regular reader of my blog then you have come across the term "Puppy High" and you know what it means but if you are new, here is the short of it.</span><br />
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Your heart starts to race, there is a slight pounding in your head. You start to sweat because you are rolling around on the floor with puppies and your chest explodes with pure love and adoration for the fluffy ball of sharp teeth and puppy breath. You feel happy even though your adrenaline is pumping and one of the pups have peed and the others are tramping in it and then standing on you. But it's okay! You are in utter bliss.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvvSIB6kCzkVkUeJQwu-OYh6kxT64Ls2LphA2odHdagrcHCF945WlK41TsTBEhRejuvOR4EqXiiYqqAtjMRNQUehu0ATyrMTQYt0Qq_VpVcxxpI4lurfsiKHmzjeUoxjAA_N9Umcz_2wWP/s1600/American+White+Shepherd-watermarked-1232815389.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvvSIB6kCzkVkUeJQwu-OYh6kxT64Ls2LphA2odHdagrcHCF945WlK41TsTBEhRejuvOR4EqXiiYqqAtjMRNQUehu0ATyrMTQYt0Qq_VpVcxxpI4lurfsiKHmzjeUoxjAA_N9Umcz_2wWP/s320/American+White+Shepherd-watermarked-1232815389.jpg" width="261" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">American White Shepherd</td></tr>
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Duanne and I will be moving in together at the end of next year and I have already started going through what kind of puppy we will be experimenting on. (To see if we would make good parents) (No weird stuff) (I promise) This is a big deal. It will be our first pet that we adopt as a couple. The only problem is what kind of dog to adopt?<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUb71CmDyNJBE1aLMgvOta9ZFr5yons1AO4vrfU69lDZq2_eVDLXAg-0E7B6lKzqmDK-AbtWRXN4Ake23hQhQzSAKSS8y4qZoyZwXtfXN7Ux-gUv-Aq85FbUCPkAvYCYtbu10Tbh0UJ5x0/s1600/coffee_poodle01.jpg_w450.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="208" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUb71CmDyNJBE1aLMgvOta9ZFr5yons1AO4vrfU69lDZq2_eVDLXAg-0E7B6lKzqmDK-AbtWRXN4Ake23hQhQzSAKSS8y4qZoyZwXtfXN7Ux-gUv-Aq85FbUCPkAvYCYtbu10Tbh0UJ5x0/s320/coffee_poodle01.jpg_w450.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Poodle</td></tr>
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I have run through every possibility in my head but I can't seem to just pick one...<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpfFl9u_TshRyDqnCreav7aptXqEs7UiXDuVNEGbeBG-qUBadWkaGkEMvDCiJa94piFO_VSpEkcFZEVhX255AWapQqSTbpk32u6Ep6Ykw8pBvII7bpE9HnGtybBKyEsBwHFFkm1PkmTy7m/s1600/Siberian-Husky-puppies-17.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="286" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpfFl9u_TshRyDqnCreav7aptXqEs7UiXDuVNEGbeBG-qUBadWkaGkEMvDCiJa94piFO_VSpEkcFZEVhX255AWapQqSTbpk32u6Ep6Ykw8pBvII7bpE9HnGtybBKyEsBwHFFkm1PkmTy7m/s320/Siberian-Husky-puppies-17.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Siberian Husky</td></tr>
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Look how bad ass and cute that husky looks!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLtAFpIalX7xvbCCeZa-RDim4BUuLsmXquvQ8o8lN9DDOxIQeQqZIO6V7oJTTs4FbixoO9dWu96Ip7BJ0YMSgbYwP3SaJpwr1OAxPWjxns81HVhTZ7fXQlRjgf_rqa8o7nf-Z_eRI2WsGI/s1600/Doberman+puppies.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="247" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLtAFpIalX7xvbCCeZa-RDim4BUuLsmXquvQ8o8lN9DDOxIQeQqZIO6V7oJTTs4FbixoO9dWu96Ip7BJ0YMSgbYwP3SaJpwr1OAxPWjxns81HVhTZ7fXQlRjgf_rqa8o7nf-Z_eRI2WsGI/s320/Doberman+puppies.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Doberman puppies</td></tr>
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I keep going through each and every scenario in my head...If we get a big dog will Duanne and I have the balls it takes for he/she to live outside/garage or kitchen or will we coddle it and we end up have a 40kg dog trying to lay on someone's shoulders?<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEQO0BB-aAP8YzAlFcVeh3PmkyoYOFd7eypsjYuB9MC9GIGqz1jRe8d7dncSHht2rrO1qqq4YzWGeVqpEuBaKV52hMz_LgJv8-wHSm_TLweuIY3yGaH315SSB4df4YqhqpD3OwkVaP7Dff/s1600/Milnerton-20110529-00266.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEQO0BB-aAP8YzAlFcVeh3PmkyoYOFd7eypsjYuB9MC9GIGqz1jRe8d7dncSHht2rrO1qqq4YzWGeVqpEuBaKV52hMz_LgJv8-wHSm_TLweuIY3yGaH315SSB4df4YqhqpD3OwkVaP7Dff/s320/Milnerton-20110529-00266.jpg" width="238" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Layla our Golden Retriever</td></tr>
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<br /></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-37736225008745702122012-06-21T11:05:00.000-07:002012-06-21T11:05:00.591-07:00My funny story by Doug the junkA dear friend of mine. Who shall remain nameless (Douglas) has been up to his shenanigans again. Just this afternoon I received an email titled "My funny story"<div>
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<span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.917969); color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">There is a new internet sensation on youtube called making the bus monitor cry. it's a video recorded by a little dip shit child and its friends as they sit on the bus verbally abusing the elderly lady on the bus who is there as a "bus monitor". They spend 10 minutes calling her fat and ugly and cussing and swearing like pirates and telling her to kill herself because she's fat and ugly, and all the while she just sits there silently crying. it has gone viral and it's got 1.2 million views after only being up for one day. As you can imagine all the world is outraged and everyone wants to kill the kids and everyone is making comments on the video on youtube about how disrespectful those kids are and they should be punished or killed and such and such. The funny part comes in when I decided to comment on the video. Here is my comment:</span><br style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.917969); color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /><br style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.917969); color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /><div style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.917969); color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<i>This comment has received too many negative votes</i><br />
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I think it's weak how everyone is just bad mouthing these poor kids. As far as I'm concerned they are the victims here. Did anyone take a second to think about what must have happened in these kids lives for them to behave in this manner. How does anyone know they weren't abused or brought up in a broken home. Child abuse is a world wide problem and everyone is just being extremely harsh toward these youngsters. A child would never act this way unless it was in self defense.</div>
<a avglsprocessed="1" dir="ltr" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/yootoobdoug" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">D</a>ouglas - 2 hours ago<br />
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I got many negative responses to that comment and I replied to each comment with an outlandish garbage remark. here are the funniest ones<br />
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<ul>
<li style="margin-left: 15px;"><div dir="ltr">
<b>You have never met a fucking teen in your life have you? Odds are they are being mean because they are stupid.</b></div>
<b><a avglsprocessed="1" dir="ltr" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/zero9112" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">G</a>ood citizen in reply to <a avglsprocessed="1" dir="ltr" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/yootoobdoug" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">doug</a>las 2 hours ago</b></li>
<li style="margin-left: 15px;"><div dir="ltr">
<b>They're probably not as stupid as you</b></div>
<b><a avglsprocessed="1" dir="ltr" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/yootoobdoug" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">doug</a>las in reply to Good citizen 2 hours ago</b></li>
</ul>
<a avglsprocessed="1" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/vergilsvamp?feature=em-comment_reply_received" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank"><br /></a><br />
<a avglsprocessed="1" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/vergilsvamp?feature=em-comment_reply_received" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank"><br /></a><br />
<b><i>Good citizen#4 has replied to your comment on <a avglsprocessed="1" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l93wAqnPQwk&lc=A0iXK0fXl5T-0vpVNVcPBjZDOwQK3ofHgDVyjNL5-K4&lch=email_reply&feature=em-comment_reply_received" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">Making The Bus Monitor Cry</a>:</i></b><br />
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<div dir="ltr" style="margin-bottom: 15px;">
<i style="font-weight: bold;">Their sad little lives have NOTHING to do with their fucking behavior! I watched my mom damn near commit suicide THREE TIMES and almost did it myself and I STILL don't act like a total jerk off. And I'm seventeen fucking years old. I'm more disciplined than half my fucking school.</i><br /></div>
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(Author's note- How does someone "damn near commit suicide?" Was it a failed attempt or just gathering the rope and chair then changing your mind?) </div>
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<b><i>D<a avglsprocessed="1" dir="ltr" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/yootoobdoug?feature=plcp" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">oug</a>las commented:</i></b><div>
<b><i>well YOU obviously haven't had enough sex</i></b><br />
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<a avglsprocessed="1" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/hellofascination0x?feature=em-comment_reply_received" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank"><br /></a><br />
<b><a avglsprocessed="1" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/hellofascination0x?feature=em-comment_reply_received" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">G</a>ood Citizen #5 has replied to your comment on <a avglsprocessed="1" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l93wAqnPQwk&lc=A0iXK0fXl5TJTuFZ6MWYagND68FAtNTlKy2mEtH26IM&lch=email_reply&feature=em-comment_reply_received" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">Making The Bus Monitor Cry</a>:</b><br />
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<b>Bullshit. A child is a human, it has free will. Kids will do and say whatever the fuck they want.</b></div>
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<b><br />Douglas commented:</b></div>
<b>what gives you the qualifications to make such an absurd statement? are you the judge of the internet? are you even human?</b><br /><br /><br /><br /><b><i>its simple. they have a severe case of ignorance.<br /><br />Good citizen #1- in reply to Douglas 22 seconds ago<br /><br />not as severe as yours<br /><br />Douglas in reply to Good citizen #1- 1 second ago</i></b><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><b>you must be a fucking retard<br /><br />Good citizen#2- in reply to Douglas 11 seconds ago<br /><br /><br /><a avglsprocessed="1" dir="ltr" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/yootoobdoug?feature=plcp" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">D</a>ouglas commented:<br />that's rich coming from you </b><br /><br /><br /><br /><b><i><br />Actually, children will act this way for a number of reasons, not only in self-defense. Peer pressure is also a huge motivator for this type of behavior. Kids want to impress their friends and do what they think will make them fit in no matter what it is. What if these were your kids and you did everything you could to raise them right and yet they act like this? We can't always only blame parents. We need kids to take responsibility for their actions; otherwise, they turn out like this.<br /><br />Good citizen #3 in reply to Douglas 57 seconds ago<br /><br /><br />Douglas commented:<br />I actually agree with you. You're right. We should burn these kids at the stake because that's what they deserve. Burn them I say and let them pay for the transgressions</i></b></div>
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</div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-335586261605436472012-04-05T12:00:00.001-07:002012-04-17T07:54:03.923-07:0010 things to do on a date.<h3><u>1) Over-share</u></h3><div>Who doesn't want to hear about the time you got really constipated and had to give yourself an enema?</div><div>.</div><div><br />
</div><h3><u>2) Talk only about yourself</u></h3><div>Men find it sexy when you take control of the conversation. Make sure you only about <i>your</i> interests and what is <i>only</i> important to <i>you</i>. In fact don't even give him a chance to speak.</div><div><br />
</div><h3><u>3) Don't talk about sport of any kind</u></h3><div>A woman must never talk about any sport to a love interest. Men only talk to other men about sport. If you start to talk about football or baseball to a man, he will automatically put you in the friendzone.</div><div><br />
</div><h3>4) <u>Don't eat with a knife and fork</u></h3><div>Use your hands. Men get turned on when a woman shoves fistfuls of food down their mouths. As an added extra make grunting noises and a burp or two to show how much you appreciate it.</div><div><br />
</div><h3><u>5) Never shave your legs, cootch or arm pits</u></h3><div>Back in the cave man days, before razors and Nair. Men found women sexy in all their unshaven glory. Although men of today do not realize it, deep down, the thought of gliding their hand up bushy leg hair is exactly the kind of thing that will make them yours forever.</div><div><br />
</div><h3><u>6) Tell him all about your ex-boyfriend</u></h3><div>Men want you to talk and bitch about your ex. In fact I encourage it! Tell them about every single detail that went wrong in your previous relationship so that they can avoid making the same mistake...You're welcome.</div><h3><u>7) Point out his faults</u></h3><div>Remember to point out his faults so that when you see him on the second date, he will have hopefully fixed most of them.</div><div><br />
</div><h3><u>8) Talk about your fertility cycle</u></h3><div>This one is very important. Really get into detail about when you ovulate and when you have your menstrual cycle. I suggest making him a presentation with pictures just so he can see what you are talking about.</div><h3><u>9) Baby talk.</u></h3><div>With the high pitched voice and the pinching of his cheeks, he will be transported back to a happy place where the only things on his agenda were eat, sleep and poop</div><div><br />
</div><h3><u>10) Don't wear deodorant or any type of perfume</u></h3><span style="font-weight: normal;">The pheromones in your sweat will allure him like nothing else! Make sure to run or exercise before a big date to get those sweat glands pumping!</span><br />
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<span style="font-weight: normal;">Now if you follow my advise, these are the type of men you will date:</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIxxTo6y3s3MUb_uV_KqAtpUjOpaayAXvT67ZCFjD2uQhvKHhlY4k_n5dzvz6FvcSYiUtDICJDuG8-vSWgq9Lq4HE_PE9dBcmDjesyoszMwKIgD557KZ3NIennsn6OiEXg0o8BOwRga2fD/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="269" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIxxTo6y3s3MUb_uV_KqAtpUjOpaayAXvT67ZCFjD2uQhvKHhlY4k_n5dzvz6FvcSYiUtDICJDuG8-vSWgq9Lq4HE_PE9dBcmDjesyoszMwKIgD557KZ3NIennsn6OiEXg0o8BOwRga2fD/s320/images.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbj4ecO0dtjL4zJiz9CCF10SBvWp-H6jKZ3tUKHFqByJsttZr002nYP-5Adgo1xoMexd1ie5mRoA5LORAaqBiSJ8GqhwZJ5vln32WWcXNg5ClJcuIGg1MUsFbHsBdz1SapY-gdVu6_IQql/s1600/images+(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="190" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbj4ecO0dtjL4zJiz9CCF10SBvWp-H6jKZ3tUKHFqByJsttZr002nYP-5Adgo1xoMexd1ie5mRoA5LORAaqBiSJ8GqhwZJ5vln32WWcXNg5ClJcuIGg1MUsFbHsBdz1SapY-gdVu6_IQql/s320/images+(1).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2v0BW8N-Q8rqJ5lHlSXXEbmpVR0cMeJu_J3rZWsTf70T9uE0YbNETckrBXt9NSXGwefcxehJ1QjQx0M7MJ9UJCDM8tuzEyC5OAHlLM3E90XdtODU2ciU3tjDk17GjxneP3WcgJwTA4nR5/s1600/sex-bomb-mnner-Chocolate-SEXY-MEN-men_large.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2v0BW8N-Q8rqJ5lHlSXXEbmpVR0cMeJu_J3rZWsTf70T9uE0YbNETckrBXt9NSXGwefcxehJ1QjQx0M7MJ9UJCDM8tuzEyC5OAHlLM3E90XdtODU2ciU3tjDk17GjxneP3WcgJwTA4nR5/s320/sex-bomb-mnner-Chocolate-SEXY-MEN-men_large.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
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</div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-299539667491217482012-02-20T08:10:00.000-08:002012-02-20T08:10:13.624-08:00A few of my favourite things...<b><u>(Please note...I started this post on the 27 of January) (I'm a bit late) (Sorry)</u></b><br />
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I'm back! I didn't mean to stay away for so long but alas, I am a procrastinator and all of a sudden it's nearly the end of January. And nearly my birthday which is on the 30th..<b><i>.(My Birthday has come and gone)</i></b><br />
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I am <b><u>BIG</u></b> on birthdays. See how serious I am? I capitalised, made it bold and underlined it. I love birthdays! It is the one day of the year that you can do anything and everything you want. Want that dress? No problem! Want cake with no calories? Sure! It is a magical day. Now you probably think "For fucks sake, grow up, not everything is sunshine and rainbows" and you know what I say to that? Peter Pan didn't have to, you pessimistic son of a dirty whore, go do drugs off a dirty toilet seat.<br />
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And now to celebrate my birthday online I have compiled a bunch of my favourite quotes, pictures...etc<br />
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<u>Family Guy</u><br />
<span class="quote_body"><b>Peter:</b> Here honey, I got you this greeting card.<br />
<b> Lois:</b> "I'm sorry I sold our daughter into slavery."<br />
<b> Peter:</b> Yeah, it was really hard to find one of those in English.</span><br />
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<span class="quote_body"> </span>Stewie: How do you not know that your reflection in the patio door isn't another dog?<br />
Brian: Hey, that guy is a d**k.<br />
<div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"></div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">Peter: Cleveland?<br />
Cleveland: Hey fellas.<br />
Peter: Holy crap! Who knew we'd run into you, except everyone cause FOX ruined it in the promos.<br />
<div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
</div>Carnie: Step right up, step right up! You won't believe your eyes. Step right up and see the amazing half man, half clam.<br />
Peter: What a ripoff, it's just Kim Cattrall sitting Indian style</div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"></div><div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
Peter: Hey Lois, you say something?<br />
Lois: Oh, just that I think that you'll love this cake.<br />
Stewie: None for me, thanks, it's gonna go straight to my vagina. <i>(to Brian)</i> That's what girls worry about, right? Having big vaginas?<br />
<div style="background-color: white; border: medium none; color: black; overflow: hidden; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;"><br />
Stewie: Oh squiggly line in my eye fluid. I see you lurking there on the peripherie of my vision. But when I try to look at you, you scurry away. Are you shy, squiggly line? Why only when I ignore you, do you return to the center of my eye? Oh, squiggly line, it's alright, you are forgiven<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjExLZ3GCSLHZR8dMXFP1mFM4f0yG03AJFsTB9unGeNxJkxw7BsUzVgRPiq6kNCobWGuA6lh8jXH_naeaZEQWze-qJskqyFaIzr4DHaz7Njm2IIs67JAz_mNk4LNo8NGMOR7kJXBnqAJU0n/s1600/FamilyGuy_09_v2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="292" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjExLZ3GCSLHZR8dMXFP1mFM4f0yG03AJFsTB9unGeNxJkxw7BsUzVgRPiq6kNCobWGuA6lh8jXH_naeaZEQWze-qJskqyFaIzr4DHaz7Njm2IIs67JAz_mNk4LNo8NGMOR7kJXBnqAJU0n/s400/FamilyGuy_09_v2.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Family Guy is just my best...</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
Boyfriend and I have started watching Teen Wolf which led me to this discovery...<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcKoBJyUrPk7cBxP58djU_im8EiOvB5qhLdkLcmz8XSqsg58nKaYEdpWm2-efDnoCraA92i6SSXhMGB5DgG1FSb0lRsCMVaAeBm0x7ARnJAHFW63Gwv0vGslYFMAvMv3bDkixVMsQJJoqj/s1600/Tyler-Hoechlin-teen-wolf-23034737-500-500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcKoBJyUrPk7cBxP58djU_im8EiOvB5qhLdkLcmz8XSqsg58nKaYEdpWm2-efDnoCraA92i6SSXhMGB5DgG1FSb0lRsCMVaAeBm0x7ARnJAHFW63Gwv0vGslYFMAvMv3bDkixVMsQJJoqj/s320/Tyler-Hoechlin-teen-wolf-23034737-500-500.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
Yes...My Gawd! Look at him all brooding and sexy. That man is Tyler Hoechlin. And do you know what is better than Tyler Hoechlin? Yes! A topless Tyler Hoechlin...<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQc60XKnsEMrKLap3Lh_enbbsqORqxFTZlZ5OqTPLOgSjenr3RjdhlwKaUAeHg3XM7rCEz4gabwA8EuSLv-oFQ-DNLSgELJWM4Je2vs6KpyDkYQoXxw56mpB1QHqdsp4JGwPi_yPg8_Vtm/s1600/Tyler-Hoechlin-in-Teen-Wolf-Ep-1x05-04.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQc60XKnsEMrKLap3Lh_enbbsqORqxFTZlZ5OqTPLOgSjenr3RjdhlwKaUAeHg3XM7rCEz4gabwA8EuSLv-oFQ-DNLSgELJWM4Je2vs6KpyDkYQoXxw56mpB1QHqdsp4JGwPi_yPg8_Vtm/s400/Tyler-Hoechlin-in-Teen-Wolf-Ep-1x05-04.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Working out like a BOSS</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLy2P6sdOjTHwTYVs4vSbHmHmnmEVqIPG1LvA1b66xuXWU67_wGHvt2Tr1nQOj-mRupxEnbaRiuyXSVjjvJh7inyo1-yPJ8pTw-U1zGnI7yonhZ-31ZYI6SrIaVjLYsBH52ZjV5mQ9hd_v/s1600/tumblr_lx4rjwz44n1r9skkxo1_500.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLy2P6sdOjTHwTYVs4vSbHmHmnmEVqIPG1LvA1b66xuXWU67_wGHvt2Tr1nQOj-mRupxEnbaRiuyXSVjjvJh7inyo1-yPJ8pTw-U1zGnI7yonhZ-31ZYI6SrIaVjLYsBH52ZjV5mQ9hd_v/s320/tumblr_lx4rjwz44n1r9skkxo1_500.png" width="213" /></a></div>Okay- Enough of that...Maybe one more ...No, must resist...<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdTcRrDhmuW7A5OCvi_CGhlmOCHpS-2RPAas5fgM_Yir3r3l9zWnZQTr1Vssy6R8NpwEdi0CLWrC75Pcm8tDInyKd0-buZXHEVKivnmg6aXunpCOLStopaag-HL9J2Efb3u2D5s1wlKNKs/s1600/job-fails-monday-thru-friday-also-seems-to-have-learned-how-to-open-doors.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdTcRrDhmuW7A5OCvi_CGhlmOCHpS-2RPAas5fgM_Yir3r3l9zWnZQTr1Vssy6R8NpwEdi0CLWrC75Pcm8tDInyKd0-buZXHEVKivnmg6aXunpCOLStopaag-HL9J2Efb3u2D5s1wlKNKs/s400/job-fails-monday-thru-friday-also-seems-to-have-learned-how-to-open-doors.jpg" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Very bitey...*snort*</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Oh! Something for the lads....I nearly forgot.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBDI7hIT5k2PH8rdL1i0fBsrjf7G4maDDXZQLqIlEELE-Lb7qvx6fDhygawGSBnjTJS1PlIj5bkWUtH6ykx903dzfCIRLrY1X9WFMKvFLeps-TbDaE4Lfaa6TKNkhOERVDlIf2zNmNU7ra/s1600/theosept.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBDI7hIT5k2PH8rdL1i0fBsrjf7G4maDDXZQLqIlEELE-Lb7qvx6fDhygawGSBnjTJS1PlIj5bkWUtH6ykx903dzfCIRLrY1X9WFMKvFLeps-TbDaE4Lfaa6TKNkhOERVDlIf2zNmNU7ra/s320/theosept.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You're welcome, Douglas</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
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</div></div></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-1773284978162402011-12-09T03:52:00.000-08:002011-12-09T03:52:26.340-08:00Things I would do if I had a snakeAs I have previously stated, I really want a snake and since I can't get one I have been spending a lot of my time pondering what I would do if I actually had a snake....<br />
<br />
<b><u>THINGS I WOULD DO IF I HAD A SNAKE.</u></b><br />
<b><u><br />
</u></b><br />
1) I would make it a little Christmas hat to fit its little head so it would also feel the Christmas spirit but I bet you are wondering, Chelsey? How would you make a snake a hat? It has no ears and could potentially fall off...Have no fear! I will get it synthetic ears made from the best snake skin or I will just put one of those annoying stretchy string things that go under the chin.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK1G59pME0609s2Hx6Ts_dOjPDs8Eq7YsrdWLSGgmjZAiKtBuu3yb-Vgv1SXpm_pIggY0osvJZY0G42KqZISHH8sfNSUiNzvWyA_PQWQ-qRuINkmqr0bPKiIsqxpVzZ30voH-1HCT_T_3h/s1600/Santa+snake.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="245" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK1G59pME0609s2Hx6Ts_dOjPDs8Eq7YsrdWLSGgmjZAiKtBuu3yb-Vgv1SXpm_pIggY0osvJZY0G42KqZISHH8sfNSUiNzvWyA_PQWQ-qRuINkmqr0bPKiIsqxpVzZ30voH-1HCT_T_3h/s400/Santa+snake.png" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<br />
2) In October there is a magical holiday that I suspect a pedophile originally started up...Come on! Dressing up so nobody knows who you are and then luring children to your house with candy in the shadow of the night? Yeah...I'm onto you, you sick perverts.<b><i> *Squinty eyes*</i></b><br />
<br />
So back to Halloween...I would hire a penis costume for a very small person with no limbs and put it on my snake and then I would bind my breasts, put my penis/snake between my legs and pretend to be Adam...Yes as in Adam and Eve (Can they arrest you for indecent exposure if it's a legit costume?)<br />
<br />
3) I would learn to knit and make it a scarf<br />
<br />
4) I would carry my snake around and go up to the most nervous looking people and casually tell them that it really calms my snake down when people give me money<br />
<br />
5) I would learn to play the flute<br />
<br />
6) We would play hide and seek for hours but he would let me win because he knows I don't like losing to creatures smaller than me especially children.<br />
<br />
7) I will tell him all my secrets and we will pinky swear and then laugh and laugh because he doesn't have hands!<br />
<br />
8) I will put a bell at the end of its tail and we would go Christmas caroling and eventually start a band<br />
<br />
9) I would wear him as a scarf and when people tried to touch it, Rumplesnakeskin (That's his name) would do a snake version of BOO!<br />
<br />
10) I will buy him a wig so he won't be self conscious about being bald.<br />
<br />
If I had a snake, it would tell me that it is time for pervy pictures!<br />
<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin0LSFjocUC9VQgfhUWmMT7uV3QTIbpPmxEKFI80-vcZgyAwmp0FEm2vT50PiC7067KuvXkgwoQ7x49ZzMSFWAGKrcd-lq8rRAnPnACET6ujYTwURsro9WlFdJY1uDVmJcTxryN4RCGqY_/s1600/Sexy+MEN+Wallpaper__yvt2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="228" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin0LSFjocUC9VQgfhUWmMT7uV3QTIbpPmxEKFI80-vcZgyAwmp0FEm2vT50PiC7067KuvXkgwoQ7x49ZzMSFWAGKrcd-lq8rRAnPnACET6ujYTwURsro9WlFdJY1uDVmJcTxryN4RCGqY_/s320/Sexy+MEN+Wallpaper__yvt2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimR9j0587irFdDOxb3UEbba6xsYKUFtS9Z5FsxeU19kkaw3xOmTwWm_cS_Qb8rOTc_PGRDuuJnK9-L-GQtRkp6T_QjsIgSY5QVFhIS-rTGxAXfS0kpbBxhed8EDYm5QWTXvVoFjVFOOMVW/s1600/sexy_men_08.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimR9j0587irFdDOxb3UEbba6xsYKUFtS9Z5FsxeU19kkaw3xOmTwWm_cS_Qb8rOTc_PGRDuuJnK9-L-GQtRkp6T_QjsIgSY5QVFhIS-rTGxAXfS0kpbBxhed8EDYm5QWTXvVoFjVFOOMVW/s320/sexy_men_08.jpg" width="212" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I know I have had this one before but DAMN!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNj8KhcGgzbC57X4MN4vDVodEPnt-cD95rCSNz53kyL8clCd_k6sbNzJ2rpkrLQSezcT6nrgWS1KDY0Z3T_q7a0b3uo5mUvHBWdRYgbZydZPuW7SBW-DZtRyTFaVEZ5VrYasX_lrEL2G2b/s1600/sexy-man.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNj8KhcGgzbC57X4MN4vDVodEPnt-cD95rCSNz53kyL8clCd_k6sbNzJ2rpkrLQSezcT6nrgWS1KDY0Z3T_q7a0b3uo5mUvHBWdRYgbZydZPuW7SBW-DZtRyTFaVEZ5VrYasX_lrEL2G2b/s320/sexy-man.jpg" width="273" /></a></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-55537872712620530222011-11-21T05:10:00.000-08:002011-11-21T05:10:58.181-08:00What a difference a year makes...A year and a half ago, the world was filled with endless possibilities. We were getting a puppy! Oh the joy of having a little bundle of fluff to cuddle and play with. We were going to go for training and it was going to be the best dog in the entire world!<br />
<br />
I don't know what the fuck happened. I took her for training and was doing everything right <i>but</i> there was a slight problem. Okay a major problem...Let me start from the beginning...<br />
<br />
We did have a puppy, a beautiful yellow Labrador, Summer was only 7 months old when she passed away, she went to get her girly bits tied and a blood clot had formed a couple days later due to a mishap. <br />
She was an amazing puppy, very intelligent and greatly loved.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW8F5KE7ZXVAtE0HjBj9Kz9Vta5FC2fQfDcMTSX1SJtCzmuV3EpGE0Y-OLBxBTclR0OPjpM0tIMKfKjWyykpq-FmjuWLbno7l-6xizImrw5ifa1avV8qS19VHUOSVwfC33ZbnOW1V8qAOo/s1600/35321_143427389001284_100000020724644_439841_7776752_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW8F5KE7ZXVAtE0HjBj9Kz9Vta5FC2fQfDcMTSX1SJtCzmuV3EpGE0Y-OLBxBTclR0OPjpM0tIMKfKjWyykpq-FmjuWLbno7l-6xizImrw5ifa1avV8qS19VHUOSVwfC33ZbnOW1V8qAOo/s400/35321_143427389001284_100000020724644_439841_7776752_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Summer</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
But enough with the sad stuff...Although a tad rushed, we got another puppy two months later, this time a golden retriever. She was adorable!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHJILIaH7GZjytkBN4tPNxUZQIrmKcOomNgL1PVJG_bAPCLy3NuFaNnY5Jo5ZBgjPvy-OXWRXhctdpJI7S_5G7P4KevchpgVCN7OARB3466lP9drIH5o2Hm_gkB_iyEVZszJgfCJlTpC5X/s1600/44784_155889367755086_100000020724644_514640_7558673_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHJILIaH7GZjytkBN4tPNxUZQIrmKcOomNgL1PVJG_bAPCLy3NuFaNnY5Jo5ZBgjPvy-OXWRXhctdpJI7S_5G7P4KevchpgVCN7OARB3466lP9drIH5o2Hm_gkB_iyEVZszJgfCJlTpC5X/s400/44784_155889367755086_100000020724644_514640_7558673_n.jpg" width="400" /> </a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Layla</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
</tbody></table> So as before I took Layla to puppy training but what people don't realize is that dog training needs consistency, all members of the family need to pitch in and help but due to recent tragedy they treated Layla like finely spun gold. Which resulted in a bit of a mess. She is not naughty per se, she is just... Well...I...She is just special.<br />
<br />
She likes to bark. A lot. At everything. Especially in the wee hours of the morning. Which pisses me off no end.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs0NsoSRFPt-7FYYuN97bYKquRW-_y2hmIEUHmJjWAu2VAEdsVBoeImFghBSHuxxB7rYgkDZcqXcsIsimVCWhDMilQio4WjHnZEtgAUxUfo-u48wtvL0TEtJs4KnK3EZMxvsBQ_2_txx1b/s1600/Layla+likes+to+bark.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs0NsoSRFPt-7FYYuN97bYKquRW-_y2hmIEUHmJjWAu2VAEdsVBoeImFghBSHuxxB7rYgkDZcqXcsIsimVCWhDMilQio4WjHnZEtgAUxUfo-u48wtvL0TEtJs4KnK3EZMxvsBQ_2_txx1b/s640/Layla+likes+to+bark.jpg" width="473" /></a></div><br />
<br />
She likes to chew on her own foot...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6XncYIAYeUhqZBJJnvNMrjiSBSDtvGaSyRCcyBaco-pPSpGcCMpYVktZQ01MWXBOQ2aRTQ3vnO-0zEUbYjyw2q_tgOtn9P-xSSUYyZTWeqvdMXaNarPW0wrRDLxw9K2RNUkaglmUwsXeI/s1600/Wtf%253F.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6XncYIAYeUhqZBJJnvNMrjiSBSDtvGaSyRCcyBaco-pPSpGcCMpYVktZQ01MWXBOQ2aRTQ3vnO-0zEUbYjyw2q_tgOtn9P-xSSUYyZTWeqvdMXaNarPW0wrRDLxw9K2RNUkaglmUwsXeI/s320/Wtf%253F.jpg" width="236" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Bulimia dog"</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>She likes to steal socks...<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjINmcp8tU2ksHanYehmzj3QPpnCyq45Ibjbv1GrVL39h-E3TEWRjhFGOjP7WGET1riFvlcjgzo09bJnnJj2XyDboZs-4IR8zgzR9kTlC1LjFosmIdy-O2_iwRG_-bAXd-g52vq7vc1skbB/s1600/Milnerton-20110815-00421.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjINmcp8tU2ksHanYehmzj3QPpnCyq45Ibjbv1GrVL39h-E3TEWRjhFGOjP7WGET1riFvlcjgzo09bJnnJj2XyDboZs-4IR8zgzR9kTlC1LjFosmIdy-O2_iwRG_-bAXd-g52vq7vc1skbB/s320/Milnerton-20110815-00421.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br />
She also watches TV...<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSecbW7JOLMsNsVwf3eZ0DQxravAtXAIalyGvoSM6NLZ5hx2JFIMG5yxkNlG3MjFCrzx4ocFnjlxNxPTvq6ixWO89j1o9f8PWkHtfjtQi9Z-AO60zXgPSyEsF11I8jDQ5Vcqstw3JvLXOu/s1600/IMG-20110812-00415.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSecbW7JOLMsNsVwf3eZ0DQxravAtXAIalyGvoSM6NLZ5hx2JFIMG5yxkNlG3MjFCrzx4ocFnjlxNxPTvq6ixWO89j1o9f8PWkHtfjtQi9Z-AO60zXgPSyEsF11I8jDQ5Vcqstw3JvLXOu/s320/IMG-20110812-00415.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
<br />
She is also scared of everything....<br />
<br />
....<br />
....<br />
<br />
<b>Every. Thing </b><br />
<br />
Water<br />
Live bugs, if dead, she will eat them<br />
Curtains<br />
Hair dryer<br />
Door creaking<br />
Sea weed<br />
Balloons<br />
Dog toys that squeak and/or hard<br />
<br />
But when it comes down to it, I love that special, crazy dog with all my heart...<br />
<br />
Who can resist such a beautiful face?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG9xaHQIrQP5-7yjFuooZc3HBmxt7TKJyywByfTv_nNRPrBzBxxNDvTQa8mKxo4XXVdgTXiIZuCmYHP0Bc2RbqwRwK4UykS7xQldjTBAbVj-y3MTa8FpuqZlXDzQfyixvncu1TaCbQcylT/s1600/Milnerton-20110611-00284.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG9xaHQIrQP5-7yjFuooZc3HBmxt7TKJyywByfTv_nNRPrBzBxxNDvTQa8mKxo4XXVdgTXiIZuCmYHP0Bc2RbqwRwK4UykS7xQldjTBAbVj-y3MTa8FpuqZlXDzQfyixvncu1TaCbQcylT/s320/Milnerton-20110611-00284.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-34209047084642761482011-11-11T11:52:00.000-08:002011-12-09T04:51:31.204-08:00It is not a euphemism for penis.I have a secret desire. Okay, not so secret. I want a snake and no, that is not a euphemism for penis.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLtJGKG9wijE1SCVZQeuhdJ6p_fbLg9TSHroVcSg1EyX-J53nhGlB4hanqbU0PstM6vfQVrUe-5rkzPiYtCaJ5NcgiYWB-kx04c_fUyfntfBCqHJi6nGvNrmDfIIzUJK7M3zNbQoZxN977/s1600/ball+python+1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="272" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLtJGKG9wijE1SCVZQeuhdJ6p_fbLg9TSHroVcSg1EyX-J53nhGlB4hanqbU0PstM6vfQVrUe-5rkzPiYtCaJ5NcgiYWB-kx04c_fUyfntfBCqHJi6nGvNrmDfIIzUJK7M3zNbQoZxN977/s320/ball+python+1" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ball Python</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQFcmLWz_lectAm6tQWdtAM2D4jL_uAa8AMUX0r0l_caO3NZ9VKY3DiLSizVhyphenhyphenNg078Blf4FTMsMyCN-Oml2jDEqIUEOvO1mnkcJYpYaf6QmTaujV5zXLgvik47P94mU8RZ1fpes7ZG7GW/s1600/badly+drawn+penis.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQFcmLWz_lectAm6tQWdtAM2D4jL_uAa8AMUX0r0l_caO3NZ9VKY3DiLSizVhyphenhyphenNg078Blf4FTMsMyCN-Oml2jDEqIUEOvO1mnkcJYpYaf6QmTaujV5zXLgvik47P94mU8RZ1fpes7ZG7GW/s320/badly+drawn+penis.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not what I am talking about.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
<br />
Me: "Mom, I want a royal python."<br />
Mom: "For what?<br />
Me: "To hold and play with."<br />
Mom: "Play with Duanne's snake."<br />
Me: "Okay" <i>Walks to my room...</i><br />
Mom: "NOT HERE!"<br />
<br />
You may have surmised that the only snake Duanne has is the one in his pants and that is useless to me. Well not completely useless <i><b>*Wink Wink*</b></i> but it ain't no royal python... Not that he is small in any way but you know what I mean...I want a royal python and not Boyfriend's penis...Not that I don't want his penis but I can't exactly throw it over my shoulders and walk around the house.Why am I even talking about Boyfriends penis? Let's move on...<br />
..........<br />
..........<br />
..........<br />
<br />
...Cock.<br />
Okay, got that out of my system.<br />
<br />
So I desperately want a snake but my parents are firm believers that snakes are the scariest things alive and will not even consider coming near one, let alone live with one.<br />
In fact my father has no idea what tree I fell out of since nobody in my family likes those non-legged reptiles.<br />
<br />
Oh? What was that? You want something to perv over? Oh alright!<br />
PERV.OVER.ALL.THE THINGS!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2deEl8RTe0vhvNZptx3lf2zCHZOI0ct2d92tJhCOGKglLxczfqVS4IPBf4ME9w6z7mM64-qAhabFcB108mAZDPJhhyphenhyphendG_cYw1JZTgyKv2RKO8XCDG-KbeFFpiv5IlPXCuIsdNRsxcKMfd/s1600/SMHS1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2deEl8RTe0vhvNZptx3lf2zCHZOI0ct2d92tJhCOGKglLxczfqVS4IPBf4ME9w6z7mM64-qAhabFcB108mAZDPJhhyphenhyphendG_cYw1JZTgyKv2RKO8XCDG-KbeFFpiv5IlPXCuIsdNRsxcKMfd/s320/SMHS1" width="240" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbKEktzIlKKnhf7QEXAXZb20kuzfcvfidOYxT4FioRko8KJ7UhcvbOaTjiENs9NdzdpUn8I5dWhIs8HccAcG-UbnUTGMcxV-U6kf66lqbeu2UKwr1K1oZZUg7ReLYbhvjU2noftNbEg4Oc/s1600/SMHS2" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="188" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbKEktzIlKKnhf7QEXAXZb20kuzfcvfidOYxT4FioRko8KJ7UhcvbOaTjiENs9NdzdpUn8I5dWhIs8HccAcG-UbnUTGMcxV-U6kf66lqbeu2UKwr1K1oZZUg7ReLYbhvjU2noftNbEg4Oc/s320/SMHS2" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxIdqJlrpF0z0BKuFrlGKy8CauL9hEX5SePw8v8y60pZL7-xl7FaR1prBVnrMVGI-SHE_Uen9zOdHD0C3GAyl-KjOQ5JYosUMqxOcvr2WiTLyR4dt6e-0iKtYYAPQcuXhGxZE7o1QiXRlT/s1600/1828R-13442.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxIdqJlrpF0z0BKuFrlGKy8CauL9hEX5SePw8v8y60pZL7-xl7FaR1prBVnrMVGI-SHE_Uen9zOdHD0C3GAyl-KjOQ5JYosUMqxOcvr2WiTLyR4dt6e-0iKtYYAPQcuXhGxZE7o1QiXRlT/s320/1828R-13442.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMyxQsXodotLzbiOdl5DNfJmvfgfc-NL2cmS6ENzC9_F_hQ8Wln-SPCCxr5HwB4Fi818mICm-PzdCJamzQI7IvQgS8DZUsqt5Y_ASB-_1AUNfL8dirOKBBYwYF1i1aHE7ZAvMWCZv4vk8l/s1600/images.jpg12" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMyxQsXodotLzbiOdl5DNfJmvfgfc-NL2cmS6ENzC9_F_hQ8Wln-SPCCxr5HwB4Fi818mICm-PzdCJamzQI7IvQgS8DZUsqt5Y_ASB-_1AUNfL8dirOKBBYwYF1i1aHE7ZAvMWCZv4vk8l/s1600/images.jpg12" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I will turn that frown upside down</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6-OtSawJm09k4MQu7fUQFfcy4VnPKEPjrRJU8tcInwpsJ3GjzoKtWFjdhi2FqJ8hyphenhyphenkPa6TUI9Uajd-oY1ubrzj3teCvw7HtJR-UP0A7406H3k7AI4vGO17NG27eZPa2cBpNGAvvV7TCqd/s1600/sexy_men_08.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6-OtSawJm09k4MQu7fUQFfcy4VnPKEPjrRJU8tcInwpsJ3GjzoKtWFjdhi2FqJ8hyphenhyphenkPa6TUI9Uajd-oY1ubrzj3teCvw7HtJR-UP0A7406H3k7AI4vGO17NG27eZPa2cBpNGAvvV7TCqd/s320/sexy_men_08.jpg" width="212" /></a></div> And let me not forget the lads...<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmOpBxIC-cL5FXlUNrt-Wje9CHQ6SiXog33Zeuo7lvA-raOxCaOu6VMs7YoTZFH2SShZWVanekJK28UZebyXS5x2YxtdQUfFXsvsq00GAvmgI0WCIo-AW-piqaeX8MaKrZGGsfstNggtnX/s1600/SnakesAlive1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmOpBxIC-cL5FXlUNrt-Wje9CHQ6SiXog33Zeuo7lvA-raOxCaOu6VMs7YoTZFH2SShZWVanekJK28UZebyXS5x2YxtdQUfFXsvsq00GAvmgI0WCIo-AW-piqaeX8MaKrZGGsfstNggtnX/s320/SnakesAlive1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyRY8hckNurrZB9FfTslJWVgHOPma_HhNUxXQUCd2Lpl3M33Xpn4nMWIeUySGgVBPTvBRXn0V5dCkBdJJeOs9ChXceWi-ifjA-WrhEDMt0aoH8S7xr6u7HJwVulWz0ancf-yHPByFngiKy/s1600/8241033-beautiful-woman-holding-python-standing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyRY8hckNurrZB9FfTslJWVgHOPma_HhNUxXQUCd2Lpl3M33Xpn4nMWIeUySGgVBPTvBRXn0V5dCkBdJJeOs9ChXceWi-ifjA-WrhEDMt0aoH8S7xr6u7HJwVulWz0ancf-yHPByFngiKy/s320/8241033-beautiful-woman-holding-python-standing.jpg" width="215" /></a></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-83750594918828951692011-11-06T11:08:00.000-08:002011-11-06T11:08:44.053-08:00Chicks with dicks<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7qK7NK2NRaLieesObEXN1MnZXC9xuzY41gU9xPAbbbcZux7R4mD_B-GSFjKmPjEnBY85Ss4LS5sKnJYSgcj46MTN6xdJSPViICfniLubUyZqBkI3IlB7QDviEsFIWRUajJ56GaZ_B7Wiu/s1600/Chicks+with+dicks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7qK7NK2NRaLieesObEXN1MnZXC9xuzY41gU9xPAbbbcZux7R4mD_B-GSFjKmPjEnBY85Ss4LS5sKnJYSgcj46MTN6xdJSPViICfniLubUyZqBkI3IlB7QDviEsFIWRUajJ56GaZ_B7Wiu/s400/Chicks+with+dicks.jpg" width="325" /></a></div>Now that I have your attention, you sick little perverts,<i style="font-weight: bold;"> </i>(who I am very proud to call my followers.) I would like to sincerely apologize for my lack of posts and comments and general Internet interest but alas my family has been going through a very shitty time and my mind had decided to go AWOL... Well that maybe a bit of an exaggeration as I have been able to tell complete strangers and inanimate objects to either go and fuck themselves or to just fuck off...Anything insulting really...<br />
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What has really helped me to keep utter and full blown depression away is keeping busy and this little guy...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRzEw-wTxpMcXFr5Zk41IWgmmwTNyrsETHguNZiic925SHeobdesQedOh1Ru4erlYMbvCIT44fBaD3xPwfPJIYZyI4_ynBjhhY_jjKZjR02rEguU1WCeQndyzZqc2tnVdqpSDBGtwm1IkD/s1600/Baby+polar+bear.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRzEw-wTxpMcXFr5Zk41IWgmmwTNyrsETHguNZiic925SHeobdesQedOh1Ru4erlYMbvCIT44fBaD3xPwfPJIYZyI4_ynBjhhY_jjKZjR02rEguU1WCeQndyzZqc2tnVdqpSDBGtwm1IkD/s400/Baby+polar+bear.jpg" width="375" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">How freaking cute is that????</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Look at the little paws and nose and tiny ears! That was just too much for me and I went into a state I like to call a "puppy high" Which is basically when you see any baby animal (not only puppies) and basically act like a complete idiot. Large stupid grin? Check. High squeaky voice? Check. Trying to estimate whether the baby animal can fit in your bag and if you can run faster than the owner? Check.<br />
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Another thing that has kept me sorta sane is scouring the internet for funnies...these are a few of my favourites...<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixKsIwt5CBnF5lJbkBqd1YMl6teKCw5s4neOslOM1au0q5Z4gvwKzHDtJieARoWDsfKoKTYh0mWmQ3HDsCrgsMp06-mQkvzCAjpIU391VWzgkyo_UWokPzD3uiGrM_QDD1fqdzzirwHrQn/s1600/343478695_fC9NZRG3_c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixKsIwt5CBnF5lJbkBqd1YMl6teKCw5s4neOslOM1au0q5Z4gvwKzHDtJieARoWDsfKoKTYh0mWmQ3HDsCrgsMp06-mQkvzCAjpIU391VWzgkyo_UWokPzD3uiGrM_QDD1fqdzzirwHrQn/s640/343478695_fC9NZRG3_c.jpg" width="378" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhI9xfkv0vUVVBEAupWs8v88MEggAwQBn-ro8eQ7OJw8o7kjw7rK35QNosTKzpcZo1pS7N-fB6QibpvBaS6csa7AhigjSSHeQWKwSeal0fTsZPZlp-6Dna33ntU3wm-JNJ6jsBE01LI1Ax3/s1600/Awesome+horse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhI9xfkv0vUVVBEAupWs8v88MEggAwQBn-ro8eQ7OJw8o7kjw7rK35QNosTKzpcZo1pS7N-fB6QibpvBaS6csa7AhigjSSHeQWKwSeal0fTsZPZlp-6Dna33ntU3wm-JNJ6jsBE01LI1Ax3/s1600/Awesome+horse.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6-Xa5XDkx-n4C5-3GaCyvRbqLbIfJfwQ-9DoakQ4aWoY7CQIlGPpgzWMCCqoEGGJm_XAhbnk3IGe8moTakH5xDjssfcWuIaoKhLTeyNszC0I6kMn-reHpml6O8Z5a7zNjz7D7iDssoqw9/s1600/planking+or+stuck.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6-Xa5XDkx-n4C5-3GaCyvRbqLbIfJfwQ-9DoakQ4aWoY7CQIlGPpgzWMCCqoEGGJm_XAhbnk3IGe8moTakH5xDjssfcWuIaoKhLTeyNszC0I6kMn-reHpml6O8Z5a7zNjz7D7iDssoqw9/s400/planking+or+stuck.jpg" width="282" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEeyzCfyfdKVRx0kURGu8hIOyfV7sHHbxgdAXTt-Uc4YuWap6jhDzFLY6UR0jlBgDXFBkg1yLCiDlFKRZTuFAIsLEQDmHqyN1UiBcLxpyCr4XDnS7LHwRAa_41vvnxUNrnaAB6z6LwzjLM/s1600/Pinnochio.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEeyzCfyfdKVRx0kURGu8hIOyfV7sHHbxgdAXTt-Uc4YuWap6jhDzFLY6UR0jlBgDXFBkg1yLCiDlFKRZTuFAIsLEQDmHqyN1UiBcLxpyCr4XDnS7LHwRAa_41vvnxUNrnaAB6z6LwzjLM/s320/Pinnochio.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHdVDZFd6qlCeTFFVgAcjdHJp1n-BsV2Q7il02xyNL_feiO1ivHNof-ZfaffYLeTigQGJYeLSXNhe3oOw0VGa9saZxes4u7c0zPG8BCwnDZxaSKqa8L30M1Zm74IsM-hJ0YK3MTC55UK7i/s1600/Ab-hancer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHdVDZFd6qlCeTFFVgAcjdHJp1n-BsV2Q7il02xyNL_feiO1ivHNof-ZfaffYLeTigQGJYeLSXNhe3oOw0VGa9saZxes4u7c0zPG8BCwnDZxaSKqa8L30M1Zm74IsM-hJ0YK3MTC55UK7i/s400/Ab-hancer.jpg" width="270" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Gotta love infomercials!!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUGqbFAL0ZqWI1Pi-BCF0_v1eUxdmfJ-ePUgRJ0OFjhwWd5BgU_PjangB2JUTqS8XwbE4vbop-B3tQghcSRKWMKTsry1GAKDzvgjwuPnDdgt0bBhGlM8mKUMcBw-Is-R2VEo9dwyd2qkXz/s1600/pumpkin+carving.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="325" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUGqbFAL0ZqWI1Pi-BCF0_v1eUxdmfJ-ePUgRJ0OFjhwWd5BgU_PjangB2JUTqS8XwbE4vbop-B3tQghcSRKWMKTsry1GAKDzvgjwuPnDdgt0bBhGlM8mKUMcBw-Is-R2VEo9dwyd2qkXz/s400/pumpkin+carving.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLzEsr4p2qVNPV2m9qZyMfvrwVs-lJGaDNokUglFgzyNWgpBgipMfDNPnfkE3oQuAaHtwXWe_0v9UXeOBCxyNIcHNPPiGBpidVFRpbR4ly7boxaTKFkPJdw-XiUkWF3XitmX7QRHM1iUiR/s1600/415067953_l0pyiZgb_c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLzEsr4p2qVNPV2m9qZyMfvrwVs-lJGaDNokUglFgzyNWgpBgipMfDNPnfkE3oQuAaHtwXWe_0v9UXeOBCxyNIcHNPPiGBpidVFRpbR4ly7boxaTKFkPJdw-XiUkWF3XitmX7QRHM1iUiR/s1600/415067953_l0pyiZgb_c.jpg" /></a></div>Okay all, a proper post is formulating in my head as I write this just wanted to let you all know I am still alive...I promise I will have some sexy ass pervertedness in countless bounds soon<br />
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xoxoChelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-19712482224416639622011-10-10T06:35:00.000-07:002011-10-10T06:35:37.331-07:00Don't dress up as a giant vagina for Halloween<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Halloween is coming up and even though it is not as big here as it is overseas, my sister and I have decided to have a Halloween party.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ8m6q6EYdJAbPC5xSsVTOuZrm2dhcWzA-6sEJX_TSZa4r2JosHhmcFZKUSnGJiTsZaMxBxaGw3iF44iEa4AnBHV_wbB5uFdn1rHwZbOgp45r5lQM7-Qhfd_wBPaaUqG23pbxqw6NNpQVx/s1600/Halloween06Winner.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ8m6q6EYdJAbPC5xSsVTOuZrm2dhcWzA-6sEJX_TSZa4r2JosHhmcFZKUSnGJiTsZaMxBxaGw3iF44iEa4AnBHV_wbB5uFdn1rHwZbOgp45r5lQM7-Qhfd_wBPaaUqG23pbxqw6NNpQVx/s400/Halloween06Winner.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Halloween time in America</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd-TPrHSTUbbgW9eoOstF5XYcupmxFYB4OST9COggi1X8tcs4s8M-Bl3cqPrvf2cNRBm88mGlolAoFZwMppBxkcKvoHSQOM-DKCPioUWYr3fMna0S3XnxjEZdr0XL2L_MmasAu368Upkgj/s1600/house.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd-TPrHSTUbbgW9eoOstF5XYcupmxFYB4OST9COggi1X8tcs4s8M-Bl3cqPrvf2cNRBm88mGlolAoFZwMppBxkcKvoHSQOM-DKCPioUWYr3fMna0S3XnxjEZdr0XL2L_MmasAu368Upkgj/s320/house.jpg" width="308" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Halloween time in South Africa.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Now I have been doing some research about fun drinks, themes and costumes...Yeah, costumes...Some people are doing it wrong.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjanB7fDWYRqMkcK2POrLK6G92oA9I0jzEzCfyeiKQino-7jryL72DFG5HSekxsbG7V_C6mhOpoGSDLQxlnhT4ALIND1OZuGY1f0nRgB9jERdG4ILEN9dcr1LDxnuZkfOQlhoDqy5gqKGND/s1600/Sexy_Obama.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjanB7fDWYRqMkcK2POrLK6G92oA9I0jzEzCfyeiKQino-7jryL72DFG5HSekxsbG7V_C6mhOpoGSDLQxlnhT4ALIND1OZuGY1f0nRgB9jERdG4ILEN9dcr1LDxnuZkfOQlhoDqy5gqKGND/s400/Sexy_Obama.jpg" width="308" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I am quite speechless.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table>I can just imagine how this came to be...<br />
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Teenager named Jenny: Oh my gosh! like I wanna be something scary but like sexy too, ya know what I mean, Stacey?<br />
Stacey: Like totally! What is the like, scariest thing to America?<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjctxSAvhcS1x-Q40p5rp4WpY1xpsLviK5UV82FSk6tRltBRyOKhxA8XW1emqc5jsrEsNKdeNw-4R6GTQS8qx0xw_uieAD2Q-9SnyQsZ9cuqZxBkxCM-Xrn9ja-_GQPH9_C25GSV3sv_X3C/s1600/confused_blonde_girl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjctxSAvhcS1x-Q40p5rp4WpY1xpsLviK5UV82FSk6tRltBRyOKhxA8XW1emqc5jsrEsNKdeNw-4R6GTQS8qx0xw_uieAD2Q-9SnyQsZ9cuqZxBkxCM-Xrn9ja-_GQPH9_C25GSV3sv_X3C/s320/confused_blonde_girl.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><b>*Thinky face</b></i></td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
<i>15 minutes later</i><br />
<br />
Stacey: I totally got it! That terrorist dude! Obama...Wait Osama...whatever!<br />
Jenny: But that is like totally not sexy!<br />
Stacey: We can make him sexy...<b><i>*Gives Jenny a fish pout face.</i></b><br />
<i><b>*Jenny gives a high pitched squeal then takes a photo of herself in the bathroom mirror</b></i>.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglXoSIFYgNOm9tNmIZJrz7qM8VDkaJtwLHDw0XXsmjJ9QJ-_q5DH-WDvShWHTLwD5BgGgo1vblisl5HlvokDt8o8n1xm9HUIqLn6NAXmfecT83ATn73aoya3m_hwcmCmgBY3Qw-Ge08pqo/s1600/lips.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglXoSIFYgNOm9tNmIZJrz7qM8VDkaJtwLHDw0XXsmjJ9QJ-_q5DH-WDvShWHTLwD5BgGgo1vblisl5HlvokDt8o8n1xm9HUIqLn6NAXmfecT83ATn73aoya3m_hwcmCmgBY3Qw-Ge08pqo/s320/lips.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<br />
That is when some costume company got a letter from Jenny and Stacey because I refuse to believe that more than two people are that stupid.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI2UV9_xERj_opuhy0gdcnOIhSRbLullBW-M5W60Ksn0ld89SYS_XP4h05NDxj50-vt6PgE0BV0KL3aDaIGTzAeic0-QOxDcQ0em6wFXOg6ztTyK3irzh17ng3v7ooZ0053MC1BFX58irT/s1600/hitler" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="232" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI2UV9_xERj_opuhy0gdcnOIhSRbLullBW-M5W60Ksn0ld89SYS_XP4h05NDxj50-vt6PgE0BV0KL3aDaIGTzAeic0-QOxDcQ0em6wFXOg6ztTyK3irzh17ng3v7ooZ0053MC1BFX58irT/s320/hitler" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hitler? Really?</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Men in general must really love vagina...<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhx_7_q2WffM6EJPpo2hqsWgxvem0v50WCh-UyQL2lm49dmd7fJvC4CV9-yffuewHfUv2cMvoRg8KHto07gXckMQbuhiAR_1e-yq8hKgdr_aKG0JnXhyphenhyphen-9TO-p91z9CTHjzeDAK3-n5UMDD/s1600/worst-costumes-ever-9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhx_7_q2WffM6EJPpo2hqsWgxvem0v50WCh-UyQL2lm49dmd7fJvC4CV9-yffuewHfUv2cMvoRg8KHto07gXckMQbuhiAR_1e-yq8hKgdr_aKG0JnXhyphenhyphen-9TO-p91z9CTHjzeDAK3-n5UMDD/s320/worst-costumes-ever-9.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQq0zLBwAAEJAq3kAwLHwE11RHnaPHnzfXXkWiPOwGqBQgoJbSlUeEj4tvL6QB68DgH9DA9Hd1eEPnF4nfmQeMrhEzqYbqrhVqDIt91s3LZKWYCLvLHtLOwz_PNUf3sQSyMX8wYp5UFGbK/s1600/worst-costumes-ever-11.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQq0zLBwAAEJAq3kAwLHwE11RHnaPHnzfXXkWiPOwGqBQgoJbSlUeEj4tvL6QB68DgH9DA9Hd1eEPnF4nfmQeMrhEzqYbqrhVqDIt91s3LZKWYCLvLHtLOwz_PNUf3sQSyMX8wYp5UFGbK/s320/worst-costumes-ever-11.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Giant Vagina?</td></tr>
</tbody></table>If you are thinking of dressing up as a giant vagina for Halloween...Please don't. There are amazing and exciting things to go as but having giant flappy labia swinging around is not one of them. Which is why Boyfriend and I have decided to go as zombies which is a relatively easy thing to go as <i>and</i> I get to be my normal clumsy self and not worry that I will spill anything on my clothes cause zombies just don't give a fuck. <br />
<br />
And now it is time for....<br />
<br />
Animal pictures- Halloween style? Oh Hell No!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTynB1LoLRwIdRjO8mZbTYCBvxetcCQpV2wAiCTzoys2l_mvsjXkJxNA0W9najNYn9b-hajUyeXzsGzKw-pqmAfaN4FU9i4vy3H3mNOof2Fc2F3-nQVj-DbEaDJhSIutkxwyy9QsNthTn5/s1600/pethalloween7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTynB1LoLRwIdRjO8mZbTYCBvxetcCQpV2wAiCTzoys2l_mvsjXkJxNA0W9najNYn9b-hajUyeXzsGzKw-pqmAfaN4FU9i4vy3H3mNOof2Fc2F3-nQVj-DbEaDJhSIutkxwyy9QsNthTn5/s400/pethalloween7.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj56Zd5-2wVXjT-CG0D4h1FPNNZpWPpz7sICREVk7kJxNPJ1k0bgQZtaXSrHUrUP_kVwKpF3T3UOxgWEvCOwSE79sSo-pqDIo7xj4rEVfspQP4TuAs-mRNFrw8hBjDGLYbm283UlIctak3u/s1600/darth+dog" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj56Zd5-2wVXjT-CG0D4h1FPNNZpWPpz7sICREVk7kJxNPJ1k0bgQZtaXSrHUrUP_kVwKpF3T3UOxgWEvCOwSE79sSo-pqDIo7xj4rEVfspQP4TuAs-mRNFrw8hBjDGLYbm283UlIctak3u/s320/darth+dog" width="213" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisATcGH5S1-IaMZ8tB9jnYsIsN0zjQv9Bhd4UW79Aa39SMx0gOK4WFl_50p_nT0QoPIew6E0TcjXJ2qsBBYT-Gt1fImslX88vVbHrRazL-vuwGZ_Uh7oYhXG4Ta9z4_rwnQy3Spm7cAsm3/s1600/hello+kitty" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisATcGH5S1-IaMZ8tB9jnYsIsN0zjQv9Bhd4UW79Aa39SMx0gOK4WFl_50p_nT0QoPIew6E0TcjXJ2qsBBYT-Gt1fImslX88vVbHrRazL-vuwGZ_Uh7oYhXG4Ta9z4_rwnQy3Spm7cAsm3/s320/hello+kitty" width="240" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiN0TkC0TX75ziTJvjSl7ziF2B2fcrhxZ4KDq-DOkhyphenhyphen9cXBQcUlNrOPjJkcpo1O0mwgeRdm6Tk0FoQJIxwD5C_ThNoyUFiwiDlfSTL17D3Td2xL0Xtza4s1c0BZMyBH3IGyw6CH8LCXZoJY/s1600/croc+dog" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="137" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiN0TkC0TX75ziTJvjSl7ziF2B2fcrhxZ4KDq-DOkhyphenhyphen9cXBQcUlNrOPjJkcpo1O0mwgeRdm6Tk0FoQJIxwD5C_ThNoyUFiwiDlfSTL17D3Td2xL0Xtza4s1c0BZMyBH3IGyw6CH8LCXZoJY/s400/croc+dog" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<br />
Happy Halloween everybody!Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-53398995629680062072011-09-27T01:43:00.000-07:002011-09-27T01:43:14.734-07:00Age is nothing but a number Adults are weird. Not a twenty-something year old adult. I mean a proper adult like someone in their forties with children and a house with more than one toilet. They can be smart but also unbelievably dumb, like with technology. For example:<br />
<br />
<i>*After showing my mom how to work the DVD player, I am in the kitchen making lunch</i><br />
Mom: Chelsey! How do I put the volume up?<br />
Me: Press the button that has a 'V' on it<br />
Mom: Nothing is happening!<br />
Me: The TV remote not the DVD remote!<br />
Mom: Oh... nothing is happening! Just come here!<br />
<i>*Rolling my eyes, I walk into her room and stop dead.</i><br />
<i> </i><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5y8QCe99_PLy3blKmLIiLuliOxb1Ct0dxanS17gWsM5_G1sxpO1CCuVQdbSR4A5Cs9h52yHg8rHHEuD6xSIFtYNk-6gibeTYivjCJaXfhKMOqefVp0Vx9Dx_pYQamiFoCyR5vIxIlz2R3/s1600/Y+U+NO+WORK%253F.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5y8QCe99_PLy3blKmLIiLuliOxb1Ct0dxanS17gWsM5_G1sxpO1CCuVQdbSR4A5Cs9h52yHg8rHHEuD6xSIFtYNk-6gibeTYivjCJaXfhKMOqefVp0Vx9Dx_pYQamiFoCyR5vIxIlz2R3/s400/Y+U+NO+WORK%253F.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not the TV remote, it was the DSTV remote.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
Me: Are you joking?<br />
Mom: What? Why?<br />
Me: I said TV remote. TV.<br />
Mom: Oh silly me, you are my hero!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhslB6g8xoe48weGFY4wHqPrxW0brFtpTuwPbRh4uY4x2jc8gbdcBYvBfuxsmTDVRuI5P1q1ITpJJ-06qS2SmQ3nWwuAiaheItkxVcAt91W_IFxyTWI4e-ua7ZpyO8bu8EBZoybNXPX_ve8/s1600/Crime+fighting+time%2521.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhslB6g8xoe48weGFY4wHqPrxW0brFtpTuwPbRh4uY4x2jc8gbdcBYvBfuxsmTDVRuI5P1q1ITpJJ-06qS2SmQ3nWwuAiaheItkxVcAt91W_IFxyTWI4e-ua7ZpyO8bu8EBZoybNXPX_ve8/s400/Crime+fighting+time%2521.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">She didn't really say I was her hero, I just wanted to draw this.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I know in some parts of the world I would be considered an adult already but in my own world, I'm not even close.<br />
<br />
<i><b><u>A list of reasons why I can't be an adult...yet</u></b></i><br />
<i><b><u><br />
</u></b></i><br />
1. I hate coffee (Everyone knows you are only an adult if you drink coffee)<br />
2. I love cartoons<br />
3. Only eat certain vegetables<br />
4. Can wear the same pair of socks for three days and not care<br />
5. I still do incredibly stupid things like cutting out a chunk of flesh from my arse... (Don't ask)<br />
<br />
I was chatting to my sister about it the other day, it was a rather short conversation in which I made her sort of depressed.<br />
<br />
Robyn: I can't believe you're turning twenty in a couple of months.<br />
Me: I know! I can't believe you're going to be twenty-seven.<br />
Robyn: Oh. Right.<br />
<i><b><br />
</b></i><br />
<i><b>*Awkward silence</b></i><br />
<br />
Me: I'm sorry.<br />
<br />
Hmmm....What do I have here? Is that funny pictures? Oh Hell's Yeah!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfV_bFS2R5xBP2SbBlNzJAwC9m1p2UnHmE-3AOz6CLIJEfPf82bv4MlnaRQmH4luMLc0bHdbepgz_BF79pjfU-R6DIBlZ7h60EmVQc5JkbXfJQn9x23XM0xqdXNp2byX4cU98BD28V3O-j/s1600/Owl+Fort" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfV_bFS2R5xBP2SbBlNzJAwC9m1p2UnHmE-3AOz6CLIJEfPf82bv4MlnaRQmH4luMLc0bHdbepgz_BF79pjfU-R6DIBlZ7h60EmVQc5JkbXfJQn9x23XM0xqdXNp2byX4cU98BD28V3O-j/s640/Owl+Fort" width="432" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJjvTEHC83oxkcjLnWVLD8PREEW-pG0fMBErU4VN5eJtS3g1wYwpBHzwlkI6OMA-TeWlKVtAVAfs9ySJouebw83T29nqi27rFB9mbfwV1HjoosRh5wTNmTZa4FGUkstqrhXwzfGln_VmFy/s1600/Wasn%2527t+clever" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJjvTEHC83oxkcjLnWVLD8PREEW-pG0fMBErU4VN5eJtS3g1wYwpBHzwlkI6OMA-TeWlKVtAVAfs9ySJouebw83T29nqi27rFB9mbfwV1HjoosRh5wTNmTZa4FGUkstqrhXwzfGln_VmFy/s640/Wasn%2527t+clever" width="441" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwqHgcaAm6wBE9JWJoY8aaMj_tkg2Dwy8C32_QYg1yY09PcOhyphenhyphenI5g7D2QzxcugqKIqp-eIhYh2O0WpEpAQfeLyATmyXVUAVC_aKvfQjeGh1btik0HZTVRIhA4QbXWQRw8V1xi78-KOI-AV/s1600/Owl+no" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwqHgcaAm6wBE9JWJoY8aaMj_tkg2Dwy8C32_QYg1yY09PcOhyphenhyphenI5g7D2QzxcugqKIqp-eIhYh2O0WpEpAQfeLyATmyXVUAVC_aKvfQjeGh1btik0HZTVRIhA4QbXWQRw8V1xi78-KOI-AV/s400/Owl+no" width="400" /></a></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-22735145397397737622011-09-13T05:56:00.000-07:002011-09-13T05:56:08.193-07:00Sad Panda Nerd<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwvyMQ-bgh0gzxdxwigM4pS4K49Ho7MVaF1EhWdNoXS4BpzFgD6K90rMf-FLg79K4J-vaTPsy7rUG89CmZodECiKxWFHE0WGN8epb1V1802cSrXn6Bh8FdtyOeJPMrAWxK1m-IA4IU814X/s1600/sad-panda.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwvyMQ-bgh0gzxdxwigM4pS4K49Ho7MVaF1EhWdNoXS4BpzFgD6K90rMf-FLg79K4J-vaTPsy7rUG89CmZodECiKxWFHE0WGN8epb1V1802cSrXn6Bh8FdtyOeJPMrAWxK1m-IA4IU814X/s1600/sad-panda.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sad Panda</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div><br />
</div>I am sort of sick... again...It started with a sore throat and steadily got worse but I'm not sick <i>sick,</i> like I wish I were dead instead of in this agony that my dripping, sore nose is putting me through. But I am sick enough that I have to stay in bed otherwise I get dizzy and nauseous which is not good for my already uncoordinated self.<br />
<div>I have walked into my door frame three times.</div><div><br />
</div><div>It is time to write a semi-angry letter.</div><div><br />
</div><div><i><b>Dear white blood cells</b></i></div><div><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div><i><b>Although I appreciate your hard work in fighting off germs and bacteria,</b></i></div><div><i><b>can you please hurry the fuck up and make me healthy again...</b></i></div><div><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div><i><b>Lots of love</b></i></div><div><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div><i><b>Chelsey</b></i></div><div><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><b><i><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnlULOjUhSQ">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnlULOjUhSQ</a></i></b><br />
<div><i><br />
</i></div><div>Call me a nerd- But I think that is freaking EPIC! A white blood cell chasing bacteria and absorbing it?</div><div> Fucking A!</div><div>Onto the subject of nerds...</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgG1EBLLUn38W-4Gm5KbGU6NjdmIo_JmWCT_ufcQIvT3BBlbRNypRIGwib1I31bzR9fXjnndYfqjA9I_AtmJAbtwmtoAPN7r4dgs_ycxV063wK81fUZcNtGBRA1omcKs5mRr2HGE0N9Cx6R/s1600/nerd+cat.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgG1EBLLUn38W-4Gm5KbGU6NjdmIo_JmWCT_ufcQIvT3BBlbRNypRIGwib1I31bzR9fXjnndYfqjA9I_AtmJAbtwmtoAPN7r4dgs_ycxV063wK81fUZcNtGBRA1omcKs5mRr2HGE0N9Cx6R/s400/nerd+cat.png" width="303" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Get it? *Snort*</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiacql5Ko0APb23f6N0xZ7G03ZZV6NN_L-cFtKhJi7JyEODSYI1KfOaipbtduJMx78re0MkBWtdh2VW9o_13VWxwRWf5G5yeRWzLi3h6UbcLz-xBi-5B3n8ySm2oGwq_Pp0qokNXz0hfAk0/s1600/potassium+fyalb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="94" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiacql5Ko0APb23f6N0xZ7G03ZZV6NN_L-cFtKhJi7JyEODSYI1KfOaipbtduJMx78re0MkBWtdh2VW9o_13VWxwRWf5G5yeRWzLi3h6UbcLz-xBi-5B3n8ySm2oGwq_Pp0qokNXz0hfAk0/s320/potassium+fyalb.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div><i><br />
</i></div><div>Although I call myself a nerd regularly, I'm not really... Sure, I read a lot, play lots of video games and spend most of my day laughing at memes but I just don't have the brain for it...To put it in a nutshell...I'm not smart enough to be a nerd. Which is kind of depressing but it's okay, I've got Google.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnRsbmylZYZPBJ4GvR1NEXKaFErxE2C_EM39zSH06vBNDa_TO3_oIyGQwpx3mNe3pdXwCtm_bVvX0ETTi_EkwPsJMmnXboy4COWrXS09f8b84eYhFyuFMz7tX9dPCfS1V_xWGgowFPn7Pv/s1600/no+google%253F" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnRsbmylZYZPBJ4GvR1NEXKaFErxE2C_EM39zSH06vBNDa_TO3_oIyGQwpx3mNe3pdXwCtm_bVvX0ETTi_EkwPsJMmnXboy4COWrXS09f8b84eYhFyuFMz7tX9dPCfS1V_xWGgowFPn7Pv/s400/no+google%253F" width="386" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">*Jaws Theme*</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUKmSff8535glN3PGZTGGqHOskDf25oW-qApdawscnsHfSGxVaRSiw_gzN0GGvojOygCO3pzZE40ZmU_jn_9ZZUHIJxsQuHRGhKwmzCWlgJhXbOQKc7l-y_ddeTICQ9DHyj9Km4sTUbwo3/s1600/donkey%252C+chicken%252C+cat" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="383" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUKmSff8535glN3PGZTGGqHOskDf25oW-qApdawscnsHfSGxVaRSiw_gzN0GGvojOygCO3pzZE40ZmU_jn_9ZZUHIJxsQuHRGhKwmzCWlgJhXbOQKc7l-y_ddeTICQ9DHyj9Km4sTUbwo3/s400/donkey%252C+chicken%252C+cat" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I don't why I find this so funny</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5I0nd2jPbG2FSOUDMBNsxLNe5ck5K-G2i_Ib3fSEgRpDQVAyTCodj55cK0CNuMxRy0Zbm22IEpXplb15PyZZLTCNluVHCM6J_DEnuxvvtszXx7ETBUhgvwMNxlAOl3wstVfApauUpuCqN/s1600/You+my+mommy%253F" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5I0nd2jPbG2FSOUDMBNsxLNe5ck5K-G2i_Ib3fSEgRpDQVAyTCodj55cK0CNuMxRy0Zbm22IEpXplb15PyZZLTCNluVHCM6J_DEnuxvvtszXx7ETBUhgvwMNxlAOl3wstVfApauUpuCqN/s640/You+my+mommy%253F" width="329" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This happens every time I see a baby animal.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
</div><div><br />
</div><div>Which is kind of a problem since Tash and I started volunteering at a SPCA. We have a blast but...We might have started getting attached already...since we have named all 30 cats but that is another story...<br />
<br />
Fare thee well, bitches...<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg49wtLrl0iNYRQ0IVIFC_aENhG_S7PNYVqszSKBqvi0jxA7CRJw51b5KFOuz5TCXnA82gs3G87Ls5sED6hvyyFQ4aOU7XL5OF_2EJMYWlYnYQtv4KBbns_pwIUDvQMa43Lgsu7ChCIGarx/s1600/Not+the+same+egg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg49wtLrl0iNYRQ0IVIFC_aENhG_S7PNYVqszSKBqvi0jxA7CRJw51b5KFOuz5TCXnA82gs3G87Ls5sED6hvyyFQ4aOU7XL5OF_2EJMYWlYnYQtv4KBbns_pwIUDvQMa43Lgsu7ChCIGarx/s400/Not+the+same+egg" width="278" /></a></div><br />
</div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-29083589438864066112011-09-01T07:53:00.000-07:002011-09-01T07:53:17.660-07:00It's nearly Sexy TimeHappy Spring Day everyone!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9_mDv40vbglBWZtPrKO8qxQgFZlNGmLLfWcU-XnSvhtSVPvM2Iz_AONS8CFnQBIQakQ6LSzFgFns7ADGOgoiKBkFP5tN43beX2QEJPyrRjLkAqyoBnhgafNFXtxBXgIP_z3WjG8yBR88J/s1600/man+flower" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9_mDv40vbglBWZtPrKO8qxQgFZlNGmLLfWcU-XnSvhtSVPvM2Iz_AONS8CFnQBIQakQ6LSzFgFns7ADGOgoiKBkFP5tN43beX2QEJPyrRjLkAqyoBnhgafNFXtxBXgIP_z3WjG8yBR88J/s320/man+flower" width="320" /></a></div><br />
And Happy Autumn day for my overseas friends!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhEuYvyb2PTI7Z6KWI_qB2DaR8MaFJ7heSiKUZvwRtRSgckxQF-2Opkz_kclSkGaTN09rNYCM50PW2ld0jd_MyEFSiGRPXL7DqRktn2Lmflsflc3BK-BvoL9RAJgy8wjRHdIcWXGVkcqrb/s1600/autumn+man" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="219" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhEuYvyb2PTI7Z6KWI_qB2DaR8MaFJ7heSiKUZvwRtRSgckxQF-2Opkz_kclSkGaTN09rNYCM50PW2ld0jd_MyEFSiGRPXL7DqRktn2Lmflsflc3BK-BvoL9RAJgy8wjRHdIcWXGVkcqrb/s320/autumn+man" width="320" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Now that we have that out of the way...<br />
<br />
Boyfriend: What are you doing?<br />
Me: Research.<br />
Boyfriend: Those are just pictures of half-naked men<br />
Me: It isn't for <i>me.</i> It's for my blog.<br />
Boyfriend: Why would you be looking at naked men for your blog?<br />
Me: Supply and demand.<br />
Boyfriend: And why is you hand down your pants?<br />
Me: Oh...<br />
<br />
On a side note: Boyfriend is very understanding of me looking at half-naked men. Just as I am supportive in pointing out boobs. I can't help it, sometimes these things just need to be admired.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghYS2h3QeJ7ulUHaCI8jw1KdZc3cw1xLkTfpRDXciWA7L3X-sZQYJZj1YE0K3JYVtzM4q-tZeQDV2O_D0NyhB2jnvR4vT5ySZ2Wos6dM1mzEc8kbsShzfUDeo9n6-upQrlyVI9Hogpx8Ek/s1600/boobs12-300x231.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="246" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghYS2h3QeJ7ulUHaCI8jw1KdZc3cw1xLkTfpRDXciWA7L3X-sZQYJZj1YE0K3JYVtzM4q-tZeQDV2O_D0NyhB2jnvR4vT5ySZ2Wos6dM1mzEc8kbsShzfUDeo9n6-upQrlyVI9Hogpx8Ek/s320/boobs12-300x231.jpg" width="320" /> </a></td><td style="text-align: center;"> </td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A little something for the men.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
But let me get back on track, today is the first day of spring which leads to Summer which means bikini season. That means no more excuses about eating healthy and no more giant jackets that can hide the extra kilo or two that has been put on. Shit.<br />
Even though I whine about Winter and how cold it is, it did have some good points...Well point. Just one and that is the giant jacket part. But I digress...<br />
<br />
Spring is here, bitches! Today marks the countdown to my favourite part of year!<br />
<i>*Happy Dance</i><br />
<br />
From the 1st November onwards is my best. I <i>LOVE</i> Christmas time. It's the part of the year where I have no bad memories, no worries and I can poke people and say "It's nearly Christmas" and then give them a subtle hint of what I want.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvQfolKiwSyfiPbNr2f7o-T60rvms9LWon2u27eUsw9bguTBaX7nOQ9bWnF34Sy89zXYuozbl9ZmRGaA6sdAO9o0W3vPag6Dbaaeg4a8afL2CMF5iiMDrqfMTr-f-t9OhuWtCELz3SEl7Q/s1600/christmas.gift.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvQfolKiwSyfiPbNr2f7o-T60rvms9LWon2u27eUsw9bguTBaX7nOQ9bWnF34Sy89zXYuozbl9ZmRGaA6sdAO9o0W3vPag6Dbaaeg4a8afL2CMF5iiMDrqfMTr-f-t9OhuWtCELz3SEl7Q/s400/christmas.gift.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>They don't even take notice of me when I get so excited and I start to speak in one word sentences. And then I just start to point and grunt. But let's not go there.<br />
<br />
It's Kitteh TIME!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdZpnXSxJQT-pSsEnEspUicmTnhIUWnWlshZEl20fywUES9NLO6Pqitx_mPsggLeyQJPXRyuaaA5qy68rJL5_Nw9jiVxviOStTB9ffZBhVHU7AfppehqRIYa3Mex3qPCntywiwuJexGe37/s1600/funny-pictures-cats-play-a-colorblind-edition-of-twister.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdZpnXSxJQT-pSsEnEspUicmTnhIUWnWlshZEl20fywUES9NLO6Pqitx_mPsggLeyQJPXRyuaaA5qy68rJL5_Nw9jiVxviOStTB9ffZBhVHU7AfppehqRIYa3Mex3qPCntywiwuJexGe37/s400/funny-pictures-cats-play-a-colorblind-edition-of-twister.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiymOxOUvgJ2aio5FMnhMtKEMbzGiX672wSoCk_nptQ45zI72YGYktpzNSQD304fPsFj3gd6umYMa5bmu20pyxPvvmAweXqikFGGqZpV4dnHjwkzS6TAxyuTkz9TC4g2K5rWBvdYT97pIMS/s1600/kitteh1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiymOxOUvgJ2aio5FMnhMtKEMbzGiX672wSoCk_nptQ45zI72YGYktpzNSQD304fPsFj3gd6umYMa5bmu20pyxPvvmAweXqikFGGqZpV4dnHjwkzS6TAxyuTkz9TC4g2K5rWBvdYT97pIMS/s400/kitteh1" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMRPbxBAFMEq1ob9DnImZRDA8o1b5KSa1UOPGUh8AJL47IdObBanNMwOZusWOEA985VRoP_b3i4TfV7LbB7v4AIyIRJcQhNqDqaL2lwsaDflttcMjrzCMvKOaYrvPV9ANZtTV37zsFg2J2/s1600/animals%252Ccats%252Ccuss%252Cfunny%252Chilarious%252Ccat-50c3a6b4a12dbf3f0a70eef239109a4b_h.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="252" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMRPbxBAFMEq1ob9DnImZRDA8o1b5KSa1UOPGUh8AJL47IdObBanNMwOZusWOEA985VRoP_b3i4TfV7LbB7v4AIyIRJcQhNqDqaL2lwsaDflttcMjrzCMvKOaYrvPV9ANZtTV37zsFg2J2/s400/animals%252Ccats%252Ccuss%252Cfunny%252Chilarious%252Ccat-50c3a6b4a12dbf3f0a70eef239109a4b_h.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-75356071026377000992011-08-22T01:10:00.000-07:002011-08-22T01:10:36.937-07:00Beware of Doug (My special friend-part two)I have a friend named Douglas. He is very handsome and has a great arse. He doesn't know that when he is looking the other way, I will perve over his marvelous buttox and when I am lying all alone in bed I will hug my pillow pretending that it is actually him I am caressing. Okay I am lying, I just wrote all that to make him feel uncomfortable cause he reads my blog (And I love him for it)<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkff596p8fjQ-ngvd0EdJtXa5qeaYIIBzXFv9f9jJKFU06vasKs_joV-E8F1j8RLuE52AbO9X4v4tJqPRrY0BXgZpRpUTfy7If__p1bDjHQ1z4ZbyvatXZhxFiX-alpp6mzoJtcRz2NNHy/s1600/2-thumbs-up.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkff596p8fjQ-ngvd0EdJtXa5qeaYIIBzXFv9f9jJKFU06vasKs_joV-E8F1j8RLuE52AbO9X4v4tJqPRrY0BXgZpRpUTfy7If__p1bDjHQ1z4ZbyvatXZhxFiX-alpp6mzoJtcRz2NNHy/s400/2-thumbs-up.jpg" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>What can I say about Doug? Well, he has a friend called Keiran, they get up to all kinds of fuckery together, for example:<br />
<br />
<span data-jsid="text">Doug: Let's start writing a story in a manner where I write a section and you write the next section and so forth.</span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"> Keiran: No because it's lame</span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"> Doug: we can write the whole thi<span class="text_exposed_show">ng online</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> Doug: ok let's start</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> Doug: Once upon a time</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> Keiran : The end</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> Doug: fucking brilliant</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> Doug: best seller</span></span><br />
<br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Or:</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> </span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> Doug: Can I have a bite of your pie?</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Keiran: Yes. <i>*Gives Doug his pie</i></span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Doug: Thanks. <i>*Throws pie out the window </i></span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"><i> </i></span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Douglas can also be quite an asshole, outrageously funny but still an asshole...</span></span><br />
<br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Like:</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"> </span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">1) Telling a girl that his name is Johnny so after romancing her in a club, she can't find him on facebook. </span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">2) Prank calling a hairdresser whilst pretending to be an old paraplegic. He actually got them to travel to his grandmothers house for a personal visit for a haircut. (He got into a lot of shit for that one)</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">3) Not having the balls to tell a girl that he had just kissed that he had in fact, actually just thrown up a couple of minutes before.</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">4) Innocently going out for a supper on a Wednesday night but ended up getting so trashed that he had to take two days off work.</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">5) Putting his chewing gum on my sneakers since he was too lazy to go to the bin. (Thanks a lot fucker)</span></span><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisP4K6QroRzGGIF_N4q8SGcgfFsoCsoidJbIzsgvT05AlKxxRsJEiixtX9dzrjkyPxMjXPHoNpgng6GV5eepiUiQWm0pcEk_rbAutNH3SHbjurEXW4z9b81db07_AZ7TIFronf_xpy8Rt7/s1600/Douglas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisP4K6QroRzGGIF_N4q8SGcgfFsoCsoidJbIzsgvT05AlKxxRsJEiixtX9dzrjkyPxMjXPHoNpgng6GV5eepiUiQWm0pcEk_rbAutNH3SHbjurEXW4z9b81db07_AZ7TIFronf_xpy8Rt7/s400/Douglas.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yes, he is indeed handsome.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br />
</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">This is the most normal photo I could find.</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">These were my other choices...</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5L0EqWyCfV9Zm3W1b7tJsENr0nsbRCGkGoRj0qzjKQf70hsiRvbnAIIbADWlLEE7FDBKim9yDthmLn8Bbj2eAjYI3jysEmFF_jz1vOrb_bYLiyGfL0_fOigA_GTFll98kATVJFlf679zh/s1600/150257_448478171620_646971620_5984445_5327995_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5L0EqWyCfV9Zm3W1b7tJsENr0nsbRCGkGoRj0qzjKQf70hsiRvbnAIIbADWlLEE7FDBKim9yDthmLn8Bbj2eAjYI3jysEmFF_jz1vOrb_bYLiyGfL0_fOigA_GTFll98kATVJFlf679zh/s320/150257_448478171620_646971620_5984445_5327995_n.jpg" width="213" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg02wJWtheMhfqztsFUaoangEFXc62oOxil_Cw3F7Q_ayvLlHkWc9ryKWkgpcIKI78GzYNA4KlZ5UHF2CDY2fMDz1sheI-anEkiFh03PFkcK-3WiBuMePxK405Ewqz8Tqrt3FLkE8vppI1w/s1600/282416_10150746641630524_880070523_20320944_5227347_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg02wJWtheMhfqztsFUaoangEFXc62oOxil_Cw3F7Q_ayvLlHkWc9ryKWkgpcIKI78GzYNA4KlZ5UHF2CDY2fMDz1sheI-anEkiFh03PFkcK-3WiBuMePxK405Ewqz8Tqrt3FLkE8vppI1w/s320/282416_10150746641630524_880070523_20320944_5227347_n.jpg" width="213" /></a></div><span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8MdR6yP6tGjHNjTOG-aUP0nTR5ybmOHMFHPyO00mhgxyIG6-e2MbIXiMgKjshzuXdEIJf1F12vyj-ySxt8D2YPOTdn49fHygZLqJpLGGb3iQ9M7dAqj6HBOKMf-7DOD4Odm-Acpkvub22/s1600/dougie" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="264" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8MdR6yP6tGjHNjTOG-aUP0nTR5ybmOHMFHPyO00mhgxyIG6-e2MbIXiMgKjshzuXdEIJf1F12vyj-ySxt8D2YPOTdn49fHygZLqJpLGGb3iQ9M7dAqj6HBOKMf-7DOD4Odm-Acpkvub22/s320/dougie" width="320" /></a></div><span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br />
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<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Douglas is also adopted, him and his brother were orphans until their (Foster) parents adopted them. He was what he affectionately calls himself a street rat or a throw away child. He also likes to say 'Only street kids are allowed to drink beer' whilst sipping on said beverage.</span></span><br />
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<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">And now for my best Douglas quotes:</span></span><br />
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<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">"The temptation to urinate in a bath is difficult to overcome"</span></span><br />
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</span></span><br />
<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">"There is not enough beer in a bottle to fully satisfy my needs"</span></span><br />
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<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">"I put on my underpants and I walk amongst my cabbages asking them if I make them feel sexy." </span></span><br />
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<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">"Fuck"</span></span><br />
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<span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">These have nothing to do with Doug:</span></span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimk9jCkzTKXJDG-V-d-l-clr6YP25DDJ1l9il2hozjTK19mL0FNYzrcsOyJKlQmtG8rhyphenhyphenBpmPlvJRtnKzbzMDE6uQbZR6uwNCMtjT93OlXzYpPw_O-xWMWdjvQOqEg2VQ3dnS4_NfqMI9b/s1600/lost+ball" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="343" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimk9jCkzTKXJDG-V-d-l-clr6YP25DDJ1l9il2hozjTK19mL0FNYzrcsOyJKlQmtG8rhyphenhyphenBpmPlvJRtnKzbzMDE6uQbZR6uwNCMtjT93OlXzYpPw_O-xWMWdjvQOqEg2VQ3dnS4_NfqMI9b/s400/lost+ball" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtv_T3SMdHKrWvNT_ux3ulxOU5VW8jBa5LIg9q6uRmxv7OmtfU8Oz8kvi4CKdAi53Sx7-IHLDrhwdiCRXzQKofNd28O_BdQxfduh1vukW5LyR7IpcxDbtG-4aKOM_CoTpPH9rVKZQYDmD5/s1600/funny-pictures-cat-strangles-cat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtv_T3SMdHKrWvNT_ux3ulxOU5VW8jBa5LIg9q6uRmxv7OmtfU8Oz8kvi4CKdAi53Sx7-IHLDrhwdiCRXzQKofNd28O_BdQxfduh1vukW5LyR7IpcxDbtG-4aKOM_CoTpPH9rVKZQYDmD5/s400/funny-pictures-cat-strangles-cat.jpg" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOaMZ-qd9fVR_CwrCiiSnT-Q-leSa7llyX_gZ4bI9u3ktoy8tFGmI0KQMWeYn3Jk7LptPIIxITHYFjGUCIeyOrjxkJumIDPg60E4bqb4sJfRNQjS1qdgUvtFj1p3dFdllTGFjs9Idx6H72/s1600/funny-pictures-kitten-thinks-he-has-flair.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOaMZ-qd9fVR_CwrCiiSnT-Q-leSa7llyX_gZ4bI9u3ktoy8tFGmI0KQMWeYn3Jk7LptPIIxITHYFjGUCIeyOrjxkJumIDPg60E4bqb4sJfRNQjS1qdgUvtFj1p3dFdllTGFjs9Idx6H72/s400/funny-pictures-kitten-thinks-he-has-flair.jpg" width="352" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><span data-jsid="text"><span class="text_exposed_show">Have an awesome week, everyone!<br />
</span></span>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-73037477809714775202011-08-16T02:01:00.000-07:002011-08-16T02:01:18.801-07:00Swing High, Swing Low...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>I'm in a bad mood and I don't know why. It could be the slight dizziness I am experiencing from my bipolar medication or it could be the stress of looking after a sick boyfriend for a whole week. The thing that really pisses me off though is that it isn't some huge personal disaster, it's just lots of little insignificant things that are bugging me sub-consciously. I don't want to feel a bad emotion for something small, I would rather save it for a time when life really kicks you in the testicles and then sleeps with your wife whilst insulting your mother. <br />
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So to get myself out of this useless mood I am currently in, I have decided to put some of my favourite things that I find hilarious/cute/sexy or just plain racist <--- Kidding on that last one but who knows? I have a very sick sense of humour.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQLuanKlb9a_D5MLNNi28s5Isl5EB7oLZaRXWroMatvBRadExjrsWr94clvQT255iCIbSxRuJuDV0QlvUzLMkvqj1XewwDtwNzubvMzKVYn1eDyh0gt64PAQb2GfY1ElMQGgB4T5YlbJwp/s1600/alright+wall+of+china" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="255" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQLuanKlb9a_D5MLNNi28s5Isl5EB7oLZaRXWroMatvBRadExjrsWr94clvQT255iCIbSxRuJuDV0QlvUzLMkvqj1XewwDtwNzubvMzKVYn1eDyh0gt64PAQb2GfY1ElMQGgB4T5YlbJwp/s400/alright+wall+of+china" width="400" /> </a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This just had me in stitches.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMI9vVOMCHt9dSr1mtxS05dYdJuhBSlfwIABiev2x-Qia6_kzqwvv16AjgxuACazTqNzOO98QfRNhk32BueKI90WghvpTge_SqhdIlg4yqeb-ikOWF_aEaFTlfomwXTyGnXd7WtNlzgW5_/s1600/stewie+moment" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMI9vVOMCHt9dSr1mtxS05dYdJuhBSlfwIABiev2x-Qia6_kzqwvv16AjgxuACazTqNzOO98QfRNhk32BueKI90WghvpTge_SqhdIlg4yqeb-ikOWF_aEaFTlfomwXTyGnXd7WtNlzgW5_/s1600/stewie+moment" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I love Stewie Griffin.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6WbLUHUBWD1kMG8K6_midhIAgGQN7o59_gdZztRLoGN5N4LfU8gQzGiSraeIzdJgw-MlTBA_ufc3lKtTOQWLn59N27I1dXUwSbyZsgrJaNdyDZELLPiDJwDRuhPYVEsSVzgT6VYi8idG_/s1600/Kittah%2521" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6WbLUHUBWD1kMG8K6_midhIAgGQN7o59_gdZztRLoGN5N4LfU8gQzGiSraeIzdJgw-MlTBA_ufc3lKtTOQWLn59N27I1dXUwSbyZsgrJaNdyDZELLPiDJwDRuhPYVEsSVzgT6VYi8idG_/s400/Kittah%2521" width="341" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kittah!</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
</tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLlBNmEem9yDRASRnWvoyAivy4yyy7k0JNnRDExEvpmfcEckVwUBqk9cFQJNEPz3tmSaKG9Kzc-B5ESyKw9UtN68DOpgonek1rDE2D0qSSBRzuGotQmOUxCZPi2wVFzsD7nnYTxjCRnnC0/s1600/so+happy" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLlBNmEem9yDRASRnWvoyAivy4yyy7k0JNnRDExEvpmfcEckVwUBqk9cFQJNEPz3tmSaKG9Kzc-B5ESyKw9UtN68DOpgonek1rDE2D0qSSBRzuGotQmOUxCZPi2wVFzsD7nnYTxjCRnnC0/s1600/so+happy" /> </a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Story of my life</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJh1juJ_Dv6LfFO-5AYtLcSLDl-lNfoO05jk1xhaG37yxby0O8rYq6ejN8eC9CdaGj9cRLzc14KJcofcwem9QQTuiWysRfteWfBYbvFHGF0HVEoNvV-xweQfbWQcXLMqRdSAMNCsR0e-aS/s1600/racist+joke" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="322" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJh1juJ_Dv6LfFO-5AYtLcSLDl-lNfoO05jk1xhaG37yxby0O8rYq6ejN8eC9CdaGj9cRLzc14KJcofcwem9QQTuiWysRfteWfBYbvFHGF0HVEoNvV-xweQfbWQcXLMqRdSAMNCsR0e-aS/s400/racist+joke" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yip- this happened</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiZ5m1VrvH2DehxuTW3w_iISOFTutmzK1K_jV_2DYdSN6DBfPwPcwTLthnSuZlEmfbRa1r-vyKn_v4wBpjjVnSHvA7CUPEv8ST9qAsF7NfOsYSemMVmhLJ1cscUKqCaBFB_Qr-_c_vU-tz/s1600/nail+in+anus" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiZ5m1VrvH2DehxuTW3w_iISOFTutmzK1K_jV_2DYdSN6DBfPwPcwTLthnSuZlEmfbRa1r-vyKn_v4wBpjjVnSHvA7CUPEv8ST9qAsF7NfOsYSemMVmhLJ1cscUKqCaBFB_Qr-_c_vU-tz/s1600/nail+in+anus" /></a></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMMJoj9HCiCk9gib7i70NYGNgodJHE5xdFu-KQ6QrswtF4NCBCvUIhVMUIZ4onrnkVc01ho4yShydArh88L8adB_SML0fFUsJwCaiOO88oi4eoIvpbzJ8dN9MYAkxZxFm3Fh6nbfnXYJpd/s400/but+why" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I absolutely LOVE Rage comics- Freaking Genius</td></tr>
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqHQ-RjkiXHLpOhb33wERb077DYUZC5YNFk4XnYYxRNCC9KcNO587-Sz-fs3zRpuxrL09oy0cPU9BrAcbz3YrubfV0oa2QP_qOXbpku94qjjcVtURHjkmAR-WZ3l5ndCPADPbtz4q_es0J/s1600/case+of+fire" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="296" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqHQ-RjkiXHLpOhb33wERb077DYUZC5YNFk4XnYYxRNCC9KcNO587-Sz-fs3zRpuxrL09oy0cPU9BrAcbz3YrubfV0oa2QP_qOXbpku94qjjcVtURHjkmAR-WZ3l5ndCPADPbtz4q_es0J/s320/case+of+fire" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbko6naInkz2tdy3DcF4Xy1pT1AqvXzEEFu5IyVnQpX-KG9a9id6IzBcCS7OgchQ9EJ2CUP6_yE1eKwAoxjctlW6yuAoXx0xq0rLoDCJay69M1FxPyNYP8c3VBWsXMtKt1ibKO864m_SNH/s1600/sucking+thumb" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbko6naInkz2tdy3DcF4Xy1pT1AqvXzEEFu5IyVnQpX-KG9a9id6IzBcCS7OgchQ9EJ2CUP6_yE1eKwAoxjctlW6yuAoXx0xq0rLoDCJay69M1FxPyNYP8c3VBWsXMtKt1ibKO864m_SNH/s320/sucking+thumb" width="290" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrgKxaZS039ia2JF5_AgqvvpGQNgZfYOCEceh93Nm-XLE7owpakkGKcMQxzuCFEYkoQXwQuGqBA_cj1fRA8lQdfO0INQzWNujMXqUfVuJvF0_GpWFS5v7d0_xZvas6abXum9NwCj156LUP/s1600/swing+tyre" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="350" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrgKxaZS039ia2JF5_AgqvvpGQNgZfYOCEceh93Nm-XLE7owpakkGKcMQxzuCFEYkoQXwQuGqBA_cj1fRA8lQdfO0INQzWNujMXqUfVuJvF0_GpWFS5v7d0_xZvas6abXum9NwCj156LUP/s400/swing+tyre" width="400" /></a></div>I found all of these pictures on an awesome website called 9GAG.com. Seriously go take a look if you want a good chuckle, I am on page 1027 or something silly...<br />
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Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-70685798600810271862011-08-12T03:11:00.000-07:002011-08-12T03:11:27.044-07:00Is that a snake in your trousers?I am not the bravest person on earth but nor am I a coward but there are just certain things that scare the shit out of me. For example I like snakes, not all snakes but a 6ft python holds no threat to me.<br />
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</div>But a lizard on the other hand...<br />
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</div>A couple of months ago, I made my family take me to a pet expo that was being hosted in my town. As you guys know, I love animals so it was really right up my backside. They had the usual dogs and cats but upstairs was the reptile exhibit. <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I was definitely amped.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>My sister on the other hand wasn't very keen...<br />
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So as I was lying in bed that night, a little visitor decided to join us.<br />
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My sister: Chelsey! Come here quick, we need you to get rid of a lizard.<br />
Me: Are you mad? I am not touching that thing. I hate lizards.<br />
My sister: Are you kidding me? You will hold a 6ft python but you're scared of a lizard?<br />
Me: Yes. They're creepy.<br />
My sister: But...what are we supposed to do?<br />
Me: Let one of the cats get it.<br />
My sister: No shame! They'll kill it.<br />
Me: <i>*Starts to hum the circle of life from the The lion king</i>.<br />
My sister <i>*Glaring</i>: You have a sick sense of humour.<br />
Me: <i>It's the cir----cle! The circle of liiiifeeee!</i><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is Blake the Burmese Python.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>And for an apology for not writing a blog for so long;<br />
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</div>The TV will be screaming at me to buy the latest and greatest and my mind will go on this roller coaster of pure want even if the product has nothing to do with me...<br />
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Robs (My sister): You don't need floppyBgone, you don't even have a penis.<br />
Me: How do you know? I could have both sets of genitalia.<br />
Robs: You don't.<br />
Me: Exactly! I can't get an erection hence why I need FloppyBgone.<br />
Robs: <i>Sigh*</i> Fine<br />
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My favourite types are the cleaning and cooking ones because I have a thing for cleaning products (weird I know) and the cooking ones are really interesting. The rest are mostly for weight loss...<br />
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And easy exercising....Honestly, I don't even know why I watch those ones...<br />
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Nope, can't think of a single reason...<br />
<i>*Sigh</i>...<br />
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But then something magical happens, something so insane and ridiculous that the world stops and laughs and when the laughter dies down, they go out and buy the insane/ridiculous thing because how can they not? How can they pass up this opportunity?<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6g-XZ2mlInYJaeFTt-rtl-2lUtjIIgJqzagyxBaEVl0KAyRtGU0n_UCpfk3RR-zkSzCe-NDIBDOSwNLfedA9wpLB-k3e37iwbttwApjXA1Vrdkd2CcHKjqWFUCu3k5gZ_v75i3Fw3PvxL/s1600/snuggie+for+dogs" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6g-XZ2mlInYJaeFTt-rtl-2lUtjIIgJqzagyxBaEVl0KAyRtGU0n_UCpfk3RR-zkSzCe-NDIBDOSwNLfedA9wpLB-k3e37iwbttwApjXA1Vrdkd2CcHKjqWFUCu3k5gZ_v75i3Fw3PvxL/s1600/snuggie+for+dogs" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQyOVqDTjBy29yrx-HV_v_jY5J3n-BMCIRCml4AY7ARl7vQCz0BoFvvq6xB5Hff9Gq4b-40_QFY-g_dARjS2wtDFpqm6Xklu8s_OH6DQkbHxQgPkbDRc18TKgtSi7hTv_H64CIIGcMBvfS/s1600/handerpants.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQyOVqDTjBy29yrx-HV_v_jY5J3n-BMCIRCml4AY7ARl7vQCz0BoFvvq6xB5Hff9Gq4b-40_QFY-g_dARjS2wtDFpqm6Xklu8s_OH6DQkbHxQgPkbDRc18TKgtSi7hTv_H64CIIGcMBvfS/s320/handerpants.png" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQqoi10KJ9fUxHWGdfDBd9V13lUzx1FoEuGiSY96zBNciusRFPacDly_FKnnYWpAybjh649Xl0gRCKImUSE3SzVGWTFlCyXNwXU_2ZIopz-BugwMIaQMVdQtIwZ7ZKxMhP2lwg3lsD3Z9-/s1600/pastaplate3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQqoi10KJ9fUxHWGdfDBd9V13lUzx1FoEuGiSY96zBNciusRFPacDly_FKnnYWpAybjh649Xl0gRCKImUSE3SzVGWTFlCyXNwXU_2ZIopz-BugwMIaQMVdQtIwZ7ZKxMhP2lwg3lsD3Z9-/s320/pastaplate3.jpg" width="320" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>I must admit I love this weird world of ours. It is utterly ridiculous and imperfect but damn- It has some crazy imagination...Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-67182067377173845862011-07-14T04:16:00.000-07:002011-07-14T04:16:24.008-07:00How does one "whore" out a blog?I was sitting on my bed, going through other people's blogs when it hit me. I want to have a successful blog. No, I want to rule the world with my blog. World blogination. Okay well not rule the <i>whole</i> world since that would seem to take a lot of work and lets face it, I am way too lazy for that. But maybe like a city of bloggers where everything is catered to our every desire.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioOdXg50ug5ozwZWn-EN0J5NMQVaNDXwVrP1uXXPZ8gBQv5UhsNikWH8fF2AbIa9nt5RfUPeGrhy3RNA-MQ0_mHpkvEKxq7m6pk52nGvsfDwdmGyIFC_KQQD5nKBAkXYN0emmR3Kdu23xl/s1600/every+desire.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioOdXg50ug5ozwZWn-EN0J5NMQVaNDXwVrP1uXXPZ8gBQv5UhsNikWH8fF2AbIa9nt5RfUPeGrhy3RNA-MQ0_mHpkvEKxq7m6pk52nGvsfDwdmGyIFC_KQQD5nKBAkXYN0emmR3Kdu23xl/s400/every+desire.png" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>So back to my original question. How does one whore out a blog? Well the first thing that came to mind is hiring an exotic dancer's backside, kind of like a billboard but instead of plastic and cardboard, it will be a strippers ass.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL3JllTrf-Ps9TQTiEaQwtAzxqKjmsjcFCfOGe2MfQUmhB2R7M7zIxVwK-BOyc8nLy2hxSNeKL63RWVO7QkFE7Mbjigic28paa1R1e6wY2NHlB1FFBOg1qhLgN9VR4YHJyV1t0EqneP3jO/s1600/stripper.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL3JllTrf-Ps9TQTiEaQwtAzxqKjmsjcFCfOGe2MfQUmhB2R7M7zIxVwK-BOyc8nLy2hxSNeKL63RWVO7QkFE7Mbjigic28paa1R1e6wY2NHlB1FFBOg1qhLgN9VR4YHJyV1t0EqneP3jO/s400/stripper.png" width="400" /></a></div><br />
I also googled how much it cost to hire a stripper ass and well...The prank was on me.<br />
<b><i>HAHAHAHAHA!!* psycho eyes* pulls out hair*chews on it*</i></b><br />
<b><i><br />
</i></b><br />
Wow- so much porn. Anyways...<br />
<br />
Do I stand on the side of the road but instead of begging, I hold up a sign that has my blog address?<br />
Or do I make t-shirts with M&M written on the tits and have the whole address on the back?<br />
Maybe I should go door to door like a Jehovas' witness. Or go door to door caroling. Maybe both.<br />
<br />
Well I am not sure which to do yet so all I have been doing is reading other people's blogs and following the ones I love and leaving a comment or two (Maybe in the vain hope they will come to M&M and love my blog too or something *cough*)<br />
<br />
But in all seriousness, there is some major talent out there and I just want to express my awe and thanks in having these people either comment positively on one or two of my posts or actually follow me<br />
<i>*Happy Dance* </i><br />
<br />
To properly express my gratitude:<br />
<i> </i><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDVaxpyLDFzhtfS8PRgjB-Dbob7B3GE92-zTIKgqyjdKBA81l5BUnGIj0Fo8Uo7VqSK0oSAJB8srDvFVPI_uyGdVaQT209D0UM-bSOu4yYpZdTXAiczOt7vDTRPd5TURtn5EjikwjcUCf6/s1600/HappyBirthdayChippendales.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDVaxpyLDFzhtfS8PRgjB-Dbob7B3GE92-zTIKgqyjdKBA81l5BUnGIj0Fo8Uo7VqSK0oSAJB8srDvFVPI_uyGdVaQT209D0UM-bSOu4yYpZdTXAiczOt7vDTRPd5TURtn5EjikwjcUCf6/s400/HappyBirthdayChippendales.jpg" width="357" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I really want to see what they blanked out...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>And in other unrelated news...<br />
<br />
I passed my Drivers!!!! Whoop whoop! Finally!<br />
<i> </i><br />
And my dog is still an idiot...but those are stories for another day.Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-52843563176720843082011-06-27T12:18:00.000-07:002011-06-27T12:18:34.773-07:00Things that suck (Annoying Drunk People)I kind of dislike people in general and when these people are drunk that dislike becomes something a little more intense, not hatred just dislike and irritation mixed together in a tiny ball of animosity. Now not all drunk people are annoying some are actually fun and sometimes I like them better inebriated but there are just those few that can't handle their drink. Take boyfriend for example, I find him quite adorable when he is drunk, yes I might be biased but I don't care, he is loving and proposes a lot in which I take devilish glee in reminding him the next morning. But I digress...<br />
<br />
This weekend I met the worlds most annoying drunk, besides trying to pick fights with anything and everything that moves...<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD5X7yHixtNQb8GPGDpZPHLN0TPj97XFvzgYUhejtq6MGzy69nWNFCXBIOP3M8TIlTn03K1_MlfT6umu0ET4wbu1bs_TgELEOHl0s1KaAF2-SrFZpjMKVToImpPbymkoTAei1KGHMFfYU5/s1600/night+scene+1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD5X7yHixtNQb8GPGDpZPHLN0TPj97XFvzgYUhejtq6MGzy69nWNFCXBIOP3M8TIlTn03K1_MlfT6umu0ET4wbu1bs_TgELEOHl0s1KaAF2-SrFZpjMKVToImpPbymkoTAei1KGHMFfYU5/s400/night+scene+1.png" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> </div>He liked to stand very close to whomever he was talking too:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4pp64toM_SLIjDnF3FePJn0ME8uqEoFtdtn4942SYluKXwq24V_p7RDQ-PJCkKrUDQudbVE4P_1XmCNbO8ofZzJBJIH8I2YqTHyVd5KxkIJfk5_yjVuCDGdR97TstghMIE07kyuCMcEaC/s1600/night+scene+2.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4pp64toM_SLIjDnF3FePJn0ME8uqEoFtdtn4942SYluKXwq24V_p7RDQ-PJCkKrUDQudbVE4P_1XmCNbO8ofZzJBJIH8I2YqTHyVd5KxkIJfk5_yjVuCDGdR97TstghMIE07kyuCMcEaC/s400/night+scene+2.png" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>So on top of swearing a lot, wanting to fight and standing so close that the fumes from his breath stings your eyes, he then kept repeating himself over and over and over.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3KyKtgwg1vmYPbqIEdRxchLPu4zZ0rga0MXMKsIN6RdaQKR0F-y_PjZFD5DDBAjv57bF-JM-sOgOtfX3z9llonwdTuXOUz3k36PCQZnp2ioJpYZGHzD2FmqivTjoX9r64EpLqieRXzTOL/s1600/night+scene+3.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3KyKtgwg1vmYPbqIEdRxchLPu4zZ0rga0MXMKsIN6RdaQKR0F-y_PjZFD5DDBAjv57bF-JM-sOgOtfX3z9llonwdTuXOUz3k36PCQZnp2ioJpYZGHzD2FmqivTjoX9r64EpLqieRXzTOL/s400/night+scene+3.png" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">And then the crying...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxvjRUyJsGZ1NqzlOdgLBHNFdZUbGRZrYz4ZX1ioj7lCw-UFrH4u2KlYXYFDFP7f0ReH9vPlhYcHLY8GhSevvxzqEmsF1WjY9wa23GAQhzhT1of2LcaFZLtrj380wAtWZG29850LdV3B8n/s1600/night+scene+4.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxvjRUyJsGZ1NqzlOdgLBHNFdZUbGRZrYz4ZX1ioj7lCw-UFrH4u2KlYXYFDFP7f0ReH9vPlhYcHLY8GhSevvxzqEmsF1WjY9wa23GAQhzhT1of2LcaFZLtrj380wAtWZG29850LdV3B8n/s400/night+scene+4.png" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Luckily the man that can't handle his drink started hitting the bottle early on so went to bed quite early-ish.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Well I don't know how to end off this post so here is a picture of a cat:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-YYXMd41MLiwetFwLUZzZC93LGFf-cNUs6TPy1PM4m3afSY7BOz651Kz-RI7e4YARjizxBEMyBWFBryD4pkQ_LVqtdrZOsSEpqbxRXv3ES3cYNy8HOws1fNzu0tT05nY1Q1rdmwFS-XVk/s1600/funny-pictures-drunk-kitten.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-YYXMd41MLiwetFwLUZzZC93LGFf-cNUs6TPy1PM4m3afSY7BOz651Kz-RI7e4YARjizxBEMyBWFBryD4pkQ_LVqtdrZOsSEpqbxRXv3ES3cYNy8HOws1fNzu0tT05nY1Q1rdmwFS-XVk/s400/funny-pictures-drunk-kitten.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-47606973873368450952011-06-21T06:15:00.000-07:002011-06-21T06:15:30.312-07:00Q&A- I'm not very good at themOkay, I got this email a couple of months ago and it basically asks you a bunch of random ass questions and as I was stalking my newest follower, Kay Bee, (I am sorry, I read how you were a tad freaked out about things like that but don't worry, I am not technologically advanced enough to even hack into my own account) I saw on her blog a question and answer thing and I thought to myself, what the hell? I only have my self respect and dignity to lose, let's do it.<br />
<br />
<b>Were you named after anyone?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
No.<br />
<br />
<b>Do you use sarcasm a lot? </b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
Yes.<br />
<br />
<b>Do you still have your tonsils?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
Yes.<br />
<br />
<b>Do you wear contacts?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
No.<br />
<br />
I'm not very good at this. Let's try a question that is not yes or no.<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>What is your special talent?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
I can get lost very easily, I have no sense of direction. That counts as a special talent, right?<br />
<br />
<b>What is the worst time to say I love you?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
First date maybe? Geez I don't know.<br />
<br />
<b>What is the last CD you bought?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
Lady Gaga's Born this way- Facking Brilliant.<br />
<br />
<b>Is yours an innie or an outtie?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
Innie- I hope to goodness that we are talking about bellybuttons here...<br />
<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bee's?</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
Neither<br />
<br />
Okay that is enough for now but it has brought me onto my next subject. Job interviews. Now I have only been on one about two years ago at a video store and while they were asking me the basic questions and were about to go on to the more in depth questions I was in a conundrum. Should I answer truthfully or must I lie through my teeth. I opted for honesty and all could say is...What a waste of time. Always lie! if they ask you what your biggest weakness is say you work too hard not that you are insanely forgetful or if they ask you what is the hardest thing you had to go through say it was when your dog died and not when you first got diagnosed with a slight mental disorder.<br />
Trust me, I think I scared them a little with the last one.<br />
<br />
Anyways here is a picture I found on the internet that tickled my funny bone:<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAkZUAcRINelttGu17Q71RdNUGWNqJHLeywzsUfHr4EK-UJBZjOa_C6gDUWLmI-cg_6XpW9frsMkcIcnFySQcN4dIrs-6t05kVQ3mPNZuHGK0vs4fMOcbd3hWQYjiSQK8Nz79UgLMw4bv0/s1600/handzoff-gum.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="233" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAkZUAcRINelttGu17Q71RdNUGWNqJHLeywzsUfHr4EK-UJBZjOa_C6gDUWLmI-cg_6XpW9frsMkcIcnFySQcN4dIrs-6t05kVQ3mPNZuHGK0vs4fMOcbd3hWQYjiSQK8Nz79UgLMw4bv0/s320/handzoff-gum.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-62727937297737541092011-06-21T05:50:00.000-07:002011-06-21T05:50:18.080-07:00All we need is just a little patience. (Well it's a nice thought)I am pretty good at waiting for people, I can sit in a car for over an hour while my mother does whatever moms do in a shopping centre that takes so effing long. The first thing I do is listen to music but once that CD has played through and my vocal chords need a break from singing 'Don't stop believing' there is another glorious invention. The cellphone. Not the crappy bricks from the olden days but the new improved phones. Phones that can play movies, music and games with internet at the touch of a button...<br />
<br />
But back to the subject at hand besides being an awesome Guns&Roses song, patience is something I sometimes lack for example:<br />
<br />
<b><u>List of things I have no patience for:</u></b><br />
<br />
1. Slow internet. <br />
2. Tangled wires<br />
3. Stupid people<br />
4. Trance music<br />
5. Liars<br />
6. Ppl dat spel lyk dis<br />
7.Sugar free candy- what a load of shit<br />
8. Chain letters- I have not been murdered/slaughtered/maimed/gutted at midnight by a ghost/serial killer/demon/werewolf/ vengeful spirit or shadow.<br />
9. Asshole drivers<br />
10. Any airport waiting<br />
<br />
<b><u>List of things I do have patience for:</u></b><br />
<br />
1. Cats<br />
2. Dogs<br />
3. Any kind of animal really.<br />
4. Friends<br />
5. Food- I love food<br />
6. Learner drivers ( I'm a learner driver :D but not for long!)<br />
7. Family- sometimes<br />
<br />
Okay I have given up trying to think of things that I have patience for, there aren't many and it's starting to give me a headache.<br />
<br />
Like I said before, I care a lot for my friends and I can get a <i>little</i> bit overprotective. For example, My parents bought me my first car. (It is freaking awesome but I digress) Sarah, my dear friend drove us back from the shop and because she doesn't know the car, she stalled which made the <strike>stupid bitch </strike>woman that was thirty meters behind us have to go around us instead of straight, she was deeply unhappy and showed her hostility with a lot of head shaking, swearing, hooting and dirty looks. Sarah did all the right things, put the hazards on, apologized and all that nonsense. I on other hand smacked the window and shouted right back actually...It went a little something like this:<br />
<br />
Me: What a fucking bitch<br />
Sarah: I know but it's fine<br />
Me: No, it's not! Who the hell does she think she is!<br />
Sarah: It's ok<br />
Me (To the bitch now in front of us): Go die a pitiful death! Stupid runt.(Except runt actually started with a C)<br />
Sarah: Chels! Show a little bit of compassion.<br />
Me: Fine, Go die a slow painful death so you can say goodbye to your relatives, bitch.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd9Dcra0E-ozYnGEkE24DSLoi35TWwVBSEglIiB1jTRV5zS1TlVYmGSW-KuaMwFtxaNR08g6ElV4AcvjqQ2YwkN8hlaZ3Dmm6epeqahf3XHL_HxioNx_No9ZkrKYzkZ7Z0R6xiiGgGybyZ/s1600/piss+on+you%252C+finger.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="235" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd9Dcra0E-ozYnGEkE24DSLoi35TWwVBSEglIiB1jTRV5zS1TlVYmGSW-KuaMwFtxaNR08g6ElV4AcvjqQ2YwkN8hlaZ3Dmm6epeqahf3XHL_HxioNx_No9ZkrKYzkZ7Z0R6xiiGgGybyZ/s400/piss+on+you%252C+finger.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-64247080391139549382011-06-09T02:53:00.000-07:002011-06-09T02:53:09.276-07:00Drama Queen, Me? Puh-lease!Some people may refer to me as being a "drama queen" I don't know where they got these inaccurate accusations from but to each his own. The only time I do agree with them though is when I am sick, you think men are bad?.. I am nearly on their level. (I know, right? Crazy) But not only am I a drama queen, my moods can be somewhat... erratic.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip9pQbtfF0OQJekUtP0k10pu8raGsTp4WdiePFQhMZpGTASzrs9T6XZSKFPGIOsny0oxbUmegItPMYqPdkcGKxkS9UEC69rRE1GNMm58fchCQpP5r3EqWnK1EecZSwdM2AD3htmzyaUPGI/s1600/how+are+you+feeling%253F.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip9pQbtfF0OQJekUtP0k10pu8raGsTp4WdiePFQhMZpGTASzrs9T6XZSKFPGIOsny0oxbUmegItPMYqPdkcGKxkS9UEC69rRE1GNMm58fchCQpP5r3EqWnK1EecZSwdM2AD3htmzyaUPGI/s400/how+are+you+feeling%253F.png" width="400" /></a></div><br />
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But thankfully I have my loving sister to keep my spirits up;<br />
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<i>*Laying on my bed, playing computer games</i><br />
<br />
Robyn: Whatcha doing?<br />
Me: Same thing that I have been doing for the last three days.<br />
Robyn: Oh oka...<i> *Takes closer look at my face</i><br />
Me: What?<br />
R: Is that what you look like without make up on?<br />
Me: Yes...Why?<br />
R: Nothing, nothing...<br />
Me: Then why are you talking to the wall and not directly at me.<br />
R: You look weird.<br />
Me: I don't look that bad.<br />
R: You're pasty, white and dead looking.<br />
Me: Gee thanks.<br />
R: Like a vampire.<br />
Me: Vampires are supposed to be sexy.<br />
R: Never mind then.<br />
<br />
I guess not washing my hair for the last week hasn't helped my case but whatever, I am a sick panda, I am allowed to look like shit, even if it is pasty, white and dead looking.</div><div><br />
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</div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-5558914843759988792011-06-07T10:09:00.000-07:002011-06-07T10:12:03.376-07:00Failure to communicate.This week hasn't been the best one of my life. Yesterday morning I woke up with a sore throat and a highly annoying cough but when 7am came, I got up and got dressed and pasted on what I hoped to be a brave, confident smile.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju974bSJkPjWJZ-85JTzEnsqZ9KdhsbIo_VpcRWvGKURxUNayzILcmrkfWnOF75WTJ-FxcO7AeUxKxUgYf_FSu9BfVJDBBgumgnXiW7PnnPFkPyzW1G0RYJ-rGA-qAXngiiT7X5g07tv47/s1600/nervous+smile.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju974bSJkPjWJZ-85JTzEnsqZ9KdhsbIo_VpcRWvGKURxUNayzILcmrkfWnOF75WTJ-FxcO7AeUxKxUgYf_FSu9BfVJDBBgumgnXiW7PnnPFkPyzW1G0RYJ-rGA-qAXngiiT7X5g07tv47/s400/nervous+smile.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
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For you see I was taking my drivers test at 11am and I had a two hour lesson just before so everything was still fresh in my mind. (Fat lot of help that did) DO YOU SEE WHERE I AM GOING WITH THIS? Yip, I failed again and this time I can safely say that it wasn't my fault. I did everything perfectly up until the last parking where I barely jerked the car which apparently counts as a roll forward. But in my look at the bright side attitude I have decided to indeed look on the brighter side. So with the advise from my anger management I am going to write a letter.<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span><br />
<div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;">Dear Mr Man who failed me.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;">You are quite noticeably fat and not just a little bit porky, you have a pot belly and a half. In my caring manner and looking on the bright side of life I wanted to ask you if you are maybe diabetic? Do you have to go to the loo quite often and when you do does it burn when you pee? I hope it doesn't cause I would never wish this upon you.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;">And on the off chance you slip into a diabetic coma, can you maybe put it in the newspaper or something so I can <strike>celebrate</strike> </span><span style="font-size: small;">pray for you.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;">I also see you are going bald but that's okay, I bet your wife doesn't regret marrying you even though your wedding ring can never come off since you gotten so fat unless you cut it it off which could be a likely possibility with your diabetes and all.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;">Best wishes.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chelsey.</span></div><br />
That was just yesterday and when my aching body woke me up this morning at 5am with coughing, slight nausea and weather so cold my face was numb that was just the topping of this shit filled cake. So I have been laying in bed the whole day, complete with backache, stomachache, headache, sore throat, constant coughing, bleeding from the vagina and paining legs, all the symptoms of my period and my mild flu, I am gloriously happy.<br />
<i>Takes napkin and wipes the bullshit from her mouth*</i><br />
<br />
Okay, I am miserable<i>. </i>My body is uncomfortable from lying down and when I get up my body gets so sore I walk with a slight hump. (haha, 'hump') I can't even enjoy the junk food my wonderful mommy bought for me. Now that is a tragedy.<br />
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But so as to not get you down, here is a couple of amusing pictures that have kept me sane today...<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">Is it a yawn, is it a sneeze? I... don't... know!</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD0GADSpoWv81AEGGtRAvGDyFblz2Tflk0b-k6DrTziSwjY-wHyNcxwhqYO9kFU4U3AR_cSnJgdCA8jrlbPkKNH6cnU29Gmr03p14Lr9cTVU2NAoDD-wKUY_l1h0c_2tcRakDUBPCvAS3m/s1600/rabbit+yawn+sneeze.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="183" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD0GADSpoWv81AEGGtRAvGDyFblz2Tflk0b-k6DrTziSwjY-wHyNcxwhqYO9kFU4U3AR_cSnJgdCA8jrlbPkKNH6cnU29Gmr03p14Lr9cTVU2NAoDD-wKUY_l1h0c_2tcRakDUBPCvAS3m/s320/rabbit+yawn+sneeze.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitvk0vtVbbdJLN96JOWaSDAv6M5DLlN0pb1_4nS-GyNTJjPSFMBqFLAgqjE4Rm_WuerRerpKH3ZeXaLstrYHC-AP9qOJObAk-Gq19VRM4MP93Y7e8gWOaBV5FzBWmsBiMARaLLa01lORTH/s1600/funny_animals_37+llama.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitvk0vtVbbdJLN96JOWaSDAv6M5DLlN0pb1_4nS-GyNTJjPSFMBqFLAgqjE4Rm_WuerRerpKH3ZeXaLstrYHC-AP9qOJObAk-Gq19VRM4MP93Y7e8gWOaBV5FzBWmsBiMARaLLa01lORTH/s320/funny_animals_37+llama.jpg" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Llama say what?</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Thought CakeBetch would get a kick out of this one:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAH-Z1q_DNevB1K7E6dL8a4E9N0wv6dxQnQoPIfhoCaxWDBqFdTMYAf8dfeCIRRd_6V6gSVGmkc8SdPA7CLi8dQwTieIHuAtJ_mdv8uDFjXgV4M5T-jYCEiQcVTlehNolmr-t60RPcxWHZ/s1600/greatdane.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="273" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAH-Z1q_DNevB1K7E6dL8a4E9N0wv6dxQnQoPIfhoCaxWDBqFdTMYAf8dfeCIRRd_6V6gSVGmkc8SdPA7CLi8dQwTieIHuAtJ_mdv8uDFjXgV4M5T-jYCEiQcVTlehNolmr-t60RPcxWHZ/s320/greatdane.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i> </i>Squirrel Mimes!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4TU8_Hmm2dsgvsn1lah0jBfbfEWR4xJGb4F10A8kFgBorLjaSqPvN4c2AhyR5TaCE_8iMecBQ5nVd0a8TroAFdcsl1n56q0ROVK_R8Ks2kC_6sGvDkYsQKYvlAvIX01gqC9tmlB8P2YUP/s1600/squirrel+mimes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="254" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4TU8_Hmm2dsgvsn1lah0jBfbfEWR4xJGb4F10A8kFgBorLjaSqPvN4c2AhyR5TaCE_8iMecBQ5nVd0a8TroAFdcsl1n56q0ROVK_R8Ks2kC_6sGvDkYsQKYvlAvIX01gqC9tmlB8P2YUP/s320/squirrel+mimes.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG9XQlsQnDlBJOeslJJzOAweXuWRYSb0e04O7SsrmmDOFvOQa3Q9_WbbSmvIQBmEB2wH6DIks_V8zJtHOoEgVvGpGDT93zsk_TyZGscNRU_lJ7xwZ2MVHABo0lLWNAfJ-ngkKmu5ZckvBe/s1600/swimming+cat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="207" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG9XQlsQnDlBJOeslJJzOAweXuWRYSb0e04O7SsrmmDOFvOQa3Q9_WbbSmvIQBmEB2wH6DIks_V8zJtHOoEgVvGpGDT93zsk_TyZGscNRU_lJ7xwZ2MVHABo0lLWNAfJ-ngkKmu5ZckvBe/s320/swimming+cat.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"I will destroy you"</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table>IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE HE IS TOTALLY THINKING THAT!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv1G7r-zPOjiU7HwGmosrc8xGeY4NE7CTlxQjqMfhKZ_VAZppOe0H9bUyV_OQSKLkgxt6Hc862kP9fsMnITFuJd9FbUKos6cm834LyhA99SGQc951Vnd_oZ_OVdV6sGv8OkM4K46c49jmH/s1600/Bitch+please.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="285" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv1G7r-zPOjiU7HwGmosrc8xGeY4NE7CTlxQjqMfhKZ_VAZppOe0H9bUyV_OQSKLkgxt6Hc862kP9fsMnITFuJd9FbUKos6cm834LyhA99SGQc951Vnd_oZ_OVdV6sGv8OkM4K46c49jmH/s320/Bitch+please.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Bitch, please...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-57974086843142165592011-06-02T12:24:00.000-07:002011-06-02T12:24:40.695-07:00Driving me nuts.In just over a week I shall be going for my drivers license. Again. This will be the second time I will be trying but I am so nervous and for good reason. The first time didn't end so well...It involved a lot of hyperventilating, crying, snot, shaking and just a general feeling of thinking that I was having a heart attack at the age of eighteen. It took me six months just to rebook my test. (And for all my overseas readers, in South Africa we can only get our drivers license when we are eighteen and before you start feeling sorry for us, the upside is we are also allowed to legally drink when our big eighteenth comes around so suck it.)<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja9Ecaz0IXs3ULFwgBZmLjn0OsvHYU7oGXUitCjBy1blbJdZ6_fp3UkMQ5dyLBYMHNDIxOcFqkrXg5nI7F4E7WkhOnE-hw-WNAixprn2qYWLcLT3cbcd0KximlQNFtzM0NTlzGnChOO-Ze/s1600/sad+driver.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja9Ecaz0IXs3ULFwgBZmLjn0OsvHYU7oGXUitCjBy1blbJdZ6_fp3UkMQ5dyLBYMHNDIxOcFqkrXg5nI7F4E7WkhOnE-hw-WNAixprn2qYWLcLT3cbcd0KximlQNFtzM0NTlzGnChOO-Ze/s400/sad+driver.png" width="400" /> </a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I would like to think this is what I looked like while taking the test. Not happy just nervous.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>In Reality...<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAIy3Y4xmRKXBarEKP0oNzmlePNcuJ1F6oXZgU0bLKMT0ckQWOs1Bi-a9nNhbgJwi2PuZnJLXv-1mCYvcyXdv8bZ8Ig2mv5cFs6heqkbv8Kynkg4U50Y_ikwP9j_cFQF1N2sCMtqo7yoBl/s1600/sad+driver+reality.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAIy3Y4xmRKXBarEKP0oNzmlePNcuJ1F6oXZgU0bLKMT0ckQWOs1Bi-a9nNhbgJwi2PuZnJLXv-1mCYvcyXdv8bZ8Ig2mv5cFs6heqkbv8Kynkg4U50Y_ikwP9j_cFQF1N2sCMtqo7yoBl/s400/sad+driver+reality.png" width="400" /> </a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Add in the sniffing, snorting, hiccuping and general wailing sounds.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Now, I am not a bad driver, I'm not exactly formula one material but I'm a calm, collected driver just not when I am taking the test, as you can see by the picture above. <br />
I've been having lessons with a driving instructor, he is quite cool, laughs at my antics and is eerily calm when I get distracted while driving.<br />
<br />
Driving Instructor: Chelsey, you need to go slower.<br />
Me: Nuh uh<br />
DI: Chelsey, you have to go slower otherwise they will fail you.<br />
Me: Will they fail me if I do this?<br />
<i>*Sticks head out the window and does a bad imitation of a dog </i> <br />
DI: Yes<br />
Me: And this?<br />
<i>*Drives on the wrong side of the road </i><br />
DI: Definitely<br />
Me: And this...<br />
DI: CONCENTRATE!<br />
Me: Oh! A squirrel<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbrU0RimcQSXuRVY9nWnGMhS1_AZR_33XddH1c_5i5lv46LE3VpLUW2YxMLG9uzyJ1eAt0F9sSgRORUawp2CeWa9tvFfqmBSmprjVuBp1L1VV7ur9I44Q8rJGoI0aQztOsvpdbyuwJlCPl/s1600/squirrel-post4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbrU0RimcQSXuRVY9nWnGMhS1_AZR_33XddH1c_5i5lv46LE3VpLUW2YxMLG9uzyJ1eAt0F9sSgRORUawp2CeWa9tvFfqmBSmprjVuBp1L1VV7ur9I44Q8rJGoI0aQztOsvpdbyuwJlCPl/s320/squirrel-post4.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">HELLO MR SQUIRREL!</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Squirrels are adorable.<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqW0gVbyxFsEDX2VUnTHV8yjKwmaH3r51_TOEvbnkLDRBQH6Vn61fJqJTAMx8yczANlS3Xf3wgz-DAF5bna_31pzcHggRg9mUNTumLeSfhdW5sKgtYiLLzkJ5WUqhdPdTgtS3V0NptS9KK/s1600/einstein+squirrel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqW0gVbyxFsEDX2VUnTHV8yjKwmaH3r51_TOEvbnkLDRBQH6Vn61fJqJTAMx8yczANlS3Xf3wgz-DAF5bna_31pzcHggRg9mUNTumLeSfhdW5sKgtYiLLzkJ5WUqhdPdTgtS3V0NptS9KK/s320/einstein+squirrel.jpg" width="234" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Einstein Squirrel</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
I want to live on a farm and only have cool animals like squirrels, lions, tigers, goats, rabbits, wolves, unicorns (They totally exist) and chinchilla's. Besides having an awesome name, they look like a cross between a squirrel, mouse and a rabbit...How freaking weird is that? ugly/cute suckers<br />
<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDehGZ0nhx2h4YAYoW3OrhvyU22GgN2MJylhdwmY81U8eVnuLcaqpl_ppn-5JFW7n_sVf6YUmN-G2mzAHM6loKC3PtbljHezXXC8E7uUMK97xpyaU4eReS_mPdXaRyYVPJGsT1C3wYU-77/s1600/index.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDehGZ0nhx2h4YAYoW3OrhvyU22GgN2MJylhdwmY81U8eVnuLcaqpl_ppn-5JFW7n_sVf6YUmN-G2mzAHM6loKC3PtbljHezXXC8E7uUMK97xpyaU4eReS_mPdXaRyYVPJGsT1C3wYU-77/s320/index.jpg" width="315" /></a></div><br />
Anyhoo wish me luck guys, I am super nervous for my drivers<br />
<br />
xoxo<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span id="goog_357975612"></span><span id="goog_357975613"></span></div>Chelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2780300314270290706.post-9766363415131751562011-05-21T06:12:00.000-07:002011-05-21T06:12:39.635-07:00Ramblings of a bipolar bitch.I have a very short attention span, insanely short. My mind goes into this frenzy of thinking of the most inconsequential crap. For example: Whilst at a nearby mall, I was walking into a shop and I noticed a guy checking me out but on this particular day I wasn't exactly dressed very well. It was cold and I had a sore throat so I threw on my comfy hoodie and my uggs. So even though my gaydar wasn't going off I had to assume that this man was a homosexual and that he was judging me by my poor choice in wardrobe. Cause not to get stereotypical but gay men have an exceptional taste in clothes. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4R-Kf_pFqu3zs4yiMBBwlj1xXvlsKb1-go_jn_heyzI0sO2nyMyIQfCZl0ZsycAOq6i9yrWrM5qcDxzP5jKeDF3RRtejhXS7ARaXgZF7S5Pc3BN13mhe1VkNr7edBPxuzCKcVlWwZVxB6/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4R-Kf_pFqu3zs4yiMBBwlj1xXvlsKb1-go_jn_heyzI0sO2nyMyIQfCZl0ZsycAOq6i9yrWrM5qcDxzP5jKeDF3RRtejhXS7ARaXgZF7S5Pc3BN13mhe1VkNr7edBPxuzCKcVlWwZVxB6/s1600/images.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I think it's the shower cap.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I also live in a fantasy world where I am a rock star, actress who rescues abandoned animals and at night when I am not rocking the stage, I am a vampire/superhero. I also wear these fantastically sexy leather outfits. Well last night I was in rock star mode and whilst splashing in my bath and mentally shouting "Do you want to rock!" It finally dawned on me. I wish I could tell you what it was but I have seem to have forgotten. Crap, what on earth am I supposed to write for the rest of this post?<br />
<i>*Couple of minutes go by...</i><br />
<br />
Shit okay, I really can't remember. Umm...kitty cats, rainbows, corn field, evil children, yellow, fur, sneakers. Those are the words that have popped into my head, in that order. I am afraid I might get Alzheimer's when I'm older, my memory sucks. It's an actual fear of mine. <br />
<i>*Starts to hum</i> <i>the jaws theme music</i><br />
<br />
<i>*Picks at hangnail</i><br />
<br />
<i>*Stares at ceiling</i><br />
<br />
<i>*Plays with foot</i><br />
<i> </i><br />
<br />
<i>*Yells in pain when said foot gets a horrendous cramp</i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>*Glares at foot menacingly </i><br />
<br />
<i>*Remembers to buy slippers</i><br />
<br />
<br />
While I was looking up phobias...Weird? Me? Nah... I found this:<br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"><u>Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia</u>- Fear of<i> long words. </i>Way to fail there, scientist people.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">How on earth do you even pronounce that? I have gotten upto the hippopotamus part and thats it.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<b><u><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">And now for the top 5 phobia cock blocks</span></u></b><br />
<br />
<b><u><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">1.</span></u></b><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">Hominophobia- Fear of men.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">2.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">Hygrophobia- Fear of liquids, dampness, or moisture</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">3. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">Ithyphallophobia- Fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">4. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">Kolpophobia- Fear of genitals, particularly female.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">5. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;">Nudophobia- Fear of nudity.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"> </span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"> </span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"> </span><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"> </span><b><u><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"> </span></u></b><br />
<b><u><span style="color: black; font-family: new gothic nt;"> </span></u></b><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
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<i> </i>This post makes no sense...I'm so sorryChelseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03396706143543948694noreply@blogger.com1