Tuesday, 27 September 2011

Age is nothing but a number

 Adults are weird. Not a twenty-something year old adult. I mean a proper adult like someone in their forties with children and a house with more than one toilet. They can be smart but also unbelievably dumb, like with technology. For example:

*After showing my mom how to work the DVD player, I am in the kitchen making lunch
Mom: Chelsey! How do I put the volume up?
Me: Press the button that has a 'V' on it
Mom: Nothing is happening!
Me: The TV remote not the DVD remote!
Mom: Oh... nothing is happening! Just come here!
*Rolling my eyes, I walk into her room and stop dead.

Not the TV remote, it was the DSTV remote.

Me: Are you joking?
Mom: What? Why?
Me: I said TV remote. TV.
Mom: Oh silly me, you are my hero!

She didn't really say I was her hero, I just wanted to draw this.
I know in some parts of the world I would be considered an adult already but in my own world, I'm not even close.

A list of reasons why I can't be an adult...yet

1. I hate coffee (Everyone knows you are only an adult if you drink coffee)
2. I love cartoons
3. Only eat certain vegetables
4. Can wear the same pair of socks for three days and not care
5. I still do incredibly stupid things like cutting out a chunk of flesh from my arse... (Don't ask)

I was chatting to my sister about it the other day, it was a rather short conversation in which I made her sort of depressed.

Robyn: I can't believe you're turning twenty in a couple of months.
Me: I know! I can't believe you're going to be twenty-seven.
Robyn: Oh. Right.

*Awkward silence

Me: I'm sorry.

Hmmm....What do I have here? Is that funny pictures? Oh Hell's Yeah!

Tuesday, 13 September 2011

Sad Panda Nerd

Sad Panda

I am sort of sick... again...It started with a sore throat and steadily got worse but I'm not sick sick, like I wish I were dead instead of in this agony that my dripping, sore nose is putting me through. But I am sick enough that I have to stay in bed otherwise I get dizzy and nauseous which is not good for my already uncoordinated self.
I have walked into my door frame three times.

It is time to write a semi-angry letter.

Dear white blood cells

Although I appreciate your hard work in fighting off germs and bacteria,
can you please hurry the fuck up and make me healthy again...

Lots of love



Call me a nerd- But I think that is freaking EPIC! A white blood cell chasing bacteria and absorbing it?
 Fucking A!
Onto the subject of nerds...
Get it? *Snort*

Although I call myself a nerd regularly, I'm not really... Sure, I read a lot, play lots of video games and spend most of my day laughing at memes but I just don't have the brain for it...To put it in a nutshell...I'm not smart enough to be a nerd. Which is kind of depressing but it's okay, I've got Google.

*Jaws Theme*

I don't why I find this so funny

This happens every time I see a baby animal.

Which is kind of a problem since Tash and I started volunteering at a SPCA. We have a blast but...We might have started getting attached already...since we have named all 30 cats but that is another story...

Fare thee well, bitches...

Thursday, 1 September 2011

It's nearly Sexy Time

Happy Spring Day everyone!

 And Happy Autumn day for my overseas friends!

Now that we have that out of the way...

Boyfriend: What are you doing?
Me: Research.
Boyfriend: Those are just pictures of half-naked men
Me: It isn't for me. It's for my blog.
Boyfriend: Why would you be looking at naked men for your blog?
Me: Supply and demand.
Boyfriend: And why is you hand down your pants?
Me: Oh...

On a side note: Boyfriend is very understanding of me looking at half-naked men. Just as I am supportive in pointing out boobs. I can't help it, sometimes these things just need to be admired.

A little something for the men.

But let me get back on track, today is the first day of spring which leads to Summer which means bikini season. That means no more excuses about eating healthy and no more giant jackets that can hide the extra kilo or two that has been put on. Shit.
Even though I whine about Winter and how cold it is, it did have some good points...Well point. Just one and that is the giant jacket part. But I digress...

Spring is here, bitches! Today marks the countdown to my favourite part of year!
*Happy Dance

From the 1st November onwards is my best. I LOVE Christmas time. It's the part of the year where I have no bad memories, no worries and I can poke people and say "It's nearly Christmas" and then give them a subtle hint of what I want.

They don't even take notice of me when I get so excited and I start to speak in one word sentences. And then I just start to point and grunt. But let's not go there.

It's Kitteh TIME!