Saturday, 21 May 2011

Ramblings of a bipolar bitch.

I have a very short attention span, insanely short. My mind goes into this frenzy of thinking of the most inconsequential crap. For example: Whilst at a nearby mall, I was walking into a shop and I noticed a guy checking me out but on this particular day I wasn't exactly dressed very well. It was cold and I had a sore throat so I threw on my comfy hoodie and my uggs. So even though my gaydar wasn't going off I had to assume that this man was a homosexual and that he was judging me by my poor choice in wardrobe. Cause not to get stereotypical but gay men have an exceptional taste in clothes. Sometimes.

I think it's the shower cap.
I also live in a fantasy world where I am a rock star, actress who rescues abandoned animals and at night when I am not rocking the stage, I am a vampire/superhero. I also wear these fantastically sexy leather outfits. Well last night I was in rock star mode and whilst splashing in my bath and mentally shouting "Do you want to rock!" It finally dawned on me. I wish I could tell you what it was but I have seem to have forgotten. Crap, what on earth am I supposed to write for the rest of this post?
*Couple of minutes go by...

Shit okay, I really can't remember. Umm...kitty cats, rainbows, corn field, evil children, yellow, fur, sneakers. Those are the words that have popped into my head, in that order. I am afraid I might get Alzheimer's when I'm older, my memory sucks. It's an actual fear of mine.
*Starts to hum the jaws theme music

*Picks at hangnail

*Stares at ceiling

*Plays with foot

*Yells in pain when said foot gets a horrendous cramp

*Glares at foot menacingly 

*Remembers to buy slippers

While I was looking up phobias...Weird? Me? Nah... I found this:
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia- Fear of long words. Way to fail there, scientist people.

How on earth do you even pronounce that? I have gotten upto the hippopotamus part and thats it.

And now for the top 5 phobia cock blocks

1.Hominophobia- Fear of men.

2.Hygrophobia- Fear of liquids, dampness, or moisture

3. Ithyphallophobia- Fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis.

4. Kolpophobia- Fear of genitals, particularly female.

5. Nudophobia- Fear of nudity.    

 This post makes no sense...I'm so sorry

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